Lifeline
by lastrequest
Summary: Nikola's meeting with an abnormal changes not only his fate, but that of Helen and everyone at the Sanctuary.
1. Chapter 1

Hey all, this is my first Sanctuary fanfiction. I've been wanting to write one for a while but haven't had the time until now. This fic is set directly before 'Revelations' - Helen/Nikola pairing some hints at Helen/Will. All comments appreciated :)

**Chapter one:**

Nikola was frustrated. It didn't matter how much he tried, he simply couldn't follow through with his plan without Helen's help. He still ached from the hole John had made in his torso in the attempt to kill him. He hated John. But then he supposed that was mostly because of jealousy. Helen had chosen him all those years ago. In fairness, before he went insane John seemed like the 'right' choice. The 'sensible' choice. But he felt certain that was the only reason Helen had chosen John. She was all about 'doing the right thing'.

The more he thought about it the more he felt certain Helen had feelings for him. Otherwise why was John so riled by him? He must have been able to see it… the attraction…

A low growl escaped his vampire mouth, and he increased his pace as he walked through the moonlit streets. Maybe she'd come round to his way of thinking? But then, maybe he should give up on the idea for now. He didn't want to risk losing Helen altogether and if he pursued it he would. She knew how he felt. She seemed rather unnerved by his confession of love but she wasn't completely put off by it, just surprised.

No this had to end for now. She wanted rid of the Cabal as much as him, so he was sure they could come to some sort of agreement.

Little did he know Helen was sat in the library at the Sanctuary, thinking about _him_, wondering if he had survived or if he was dead. Why did she care? He was going to kill her? She sighed, dropping her head into her hands and taking some deep breaths. He wouldn't have killed her, as much as John would have her believe. She knew Nikola could never kill her. She was the one person he couldn't follow through with his threats. How many times had he protected her in those tunnels? Telling them to leave her alone? Pushing her out of the way of the weapon that was fired? Stopping his mindless vampire like creations from hurting her?

"You ok?"

Helen heard the concern in Will's voice and put on her game face.

"Yes, I'm quite alright thank you Will. Is there something I can help you with?"

"Oh no I- I was just on my way to bed but I saw the light on and thought... I just... you don't sleep an awful lot."

"You know I can't sleep unless my patients do."

"I know but… you need _some_ sleep or you won't be any use to your patients will you."

"There are too few hours in the day as it is William. I prefer not to waste them on sleep when I can help it. I have a lot of tests to run on our most recent guest. I want to make sure he's comfortable."

"Anything I can help with?" he offered, trying hard to suppress his yawn. He was exhausted.

Helen gave him a warm smile.

"Get yourself to bed. I have it covered. Thank you."

He smiled back. She read him like a book. He made his way to his room, making a mental note to speak to her again tomorrow. She wasn't alright, despite the front she put up. She hadn't been right since the day Nikola Tesla waltzed back into her life.

Nikola tensed hearing a scream a few streets away. It was so piercing it sent shivers down even _his_ spine. He considered investigating, making his way closer to where the sound seemed to come from, then he took a different turn, deciding against it. As he turned he almost bumped into a young woman. She stared directly into his blackened eyes, her own eyes mirrored them in darkness. He wondered if she was a kindred spirit. She wasn't afraid of him. Questions flooded his mind as she reached out a pale, shaky hand and took hold of his arm for support.

Had she been the cause of that piercing scream he'd heard? Had she witnessed something? Had she escaped something? What was she doing wandering the streets at this time of the night? But before he had time to voice his questions the young woman collapsed.

"Oh-"

He reached to her quickly, stopping her banging her head on the floor as she collapsed, and considered his options. Something about the look she gave him was so haunting. Like she knew him, like she could see right into his soul, but he knew for a fact they'd never met before. But he also knew she wasn't any ordinary young woman. She had a gift, like him. He didn't know quite what her gift was yet, but she intrigued him. His choice was made. He'd take care of her until she was well enough to explain who she was and answer all his questions. He lifted her up and took her back to his hotel room.


	2. Chapter 2

Thankyou for the reviews :)

-

**Chapter two:**

Will watched Helen as she checked on one of her patients. Her movements were laboured. Her expression was ever so slightly forlorn. She worked with precision, as always, but the little differences were massively obvious to Will's gifted eyes.

"Is there something you need Will?" she asked without turning away from her patient. She always knew when she had company, no matter how quietly he had entered the room and leant against the doorway.

"I'm worried about you."

She took one last glance at the sleeping patient before removing her gloves and composing herself, then approaching Will attempting her usual air of confidence.

He quickly scanned her. Her walk was a little slower. Her eyes lacked their usual glint. Her hair was tied back and she hadn't bothered with earrings as she usually did.

"You have no reason to worry."

"You're not kidding me Magnus. You _do_ remember why you recruited me don't you?"

She smiled and lowered her eyes. She should have known he'd see through her. She'd underestimated him in that respect.

"It's nothing you need concern yourself with."

"I knew something wasn't right," he said looking pleased with himself.

"That may be the case, but I shall deal with it on my own, like I always do. Just because you've picked up on it, that isn't about to change my tried and tested methods of resolving my own problems."

"Look I- I respect your decision but sometimes talking helps. It really does."

"Will-"

"Let me finish."

She couldn't help but smile again at his insistence. She cleared her throat and waited for him to finish.

"I just want you to know, the offer's always there, if you ever wanted to talk. About… anything." He hesitated, then decided to see if he was thinking along the right lines. "Tesla, even."

Sure enough he saw her reaction to the mention of the name. Slight as it was, he homed in on it the split second he'd spoken the name. A hitched breath. A tenseness in her shoulders. A lowering of her eyes again. Her mouth opening ever so slightly until she regained her composure as though nothing had even happened.

"I'll bear that in mind, thank you Will."

He'd hit the nail on the head. It was Tesla that had gotten under her skin. He gave her another smile, and then excused himself.

She knew he'd listen if she needed him to.

She watched him leave, before letting her smile disappear from her face. How on earth had he concluded that? What had she done that had given it away? That she was thinking about Tesla? Sometimes Will's insightfulness startled her. But she'd always known he had his own special gift. That's why he was such an asset to the Sanctuary. That's why she needed him.

-

She felt him watching her from across the other side of the room. She forced her eyes open. She felt dreadfully weak, but dreadfully thirsty too. She took a deep breath, every inch of her body aching as she tried to turn herself over. She tried several times before giving up and choosing instead to just lay there, shutting her eyes again and sighing with frustration.

Nikola was by her side now. He was in his human form, she could tell before looking at him. He seemed anxious, curious, unsure quite how he could help her at first. She got the impression she was seeing a side of him very few people were allowed to.

"Would you like a drink?"

There was genuine concern in his voice. She opened her eyes and they turned jet black, and Nikola got the distinct impression she was eyeing him, weighing him up, sussing him out. She turned herself over in one swift motion, staring a moment longer, before her eyes returned back to their emerald green colour, and she panted out of breath at the small exertion of her energy.

"Water would be nice, please." she said with unsteady breaths.

He leapt up at her demand, rushing to get her some water and then coming back in. When he got back, she'd passed out again.

"Damn," he cursed, setting the glass of water down on the bedside table. He sat on the edge of the bed again and just looked at her. He didn't know what it was about her but he felt a strange sense of responsibility for her. He had to admit the thought had crossed his mind that she might be a meal ticket back into Helen's good graces, but as soon as the thought had entered his mind he'd dismissed it. And that confused him. He was a man that knew what he wanted and got it, not someone who got so easily distracted.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you again for the reviews :)

**-**

**Chapter three:**

"Mom I can catch it,"

"No Ashley, you're not to even consider going anywhere near it. The species becomes extremely violent when they know they're being pursued. One second! That's all they need and they'll tear you limb from limb."

"Why don't you trust me? I can do this! I got the tip off- you'd never even have known about it if I hadn't told you!"

"No, Ashley," Helen replied with desperation in her voice.

"You've already caught one of them it can't be _that_ hard-"

"You don't know what it took to catch him. Lives… were lost Ashley. You're my daughter I'm not putting you at risk with this one. I wouldn't even put myself at that risk again."

"But you don't mind it roaming the streets, putting everyone living here at risk-"

"It won't hurt anyone unless is suspects they're a danger to it. It's passing through, they're scavengers, they don't settle. Please, it's not that I don't trust you, I simply don't trust the species. They are extremely unpredictable-"

"They're unpredictable and yet you're sure it won't hurt anyone unless they're a threat?"

Helen frowned. She was feeling exasperated.

"If there's anything that angers them it's being hunted. That much I _am_ certain of. Promise me you won't pursue this."

Ashley was reeling inside. She sighed with frustration and put her weapons down, sitting on her bed and refusing to look at her mother. Helen took it as acceptance of the situation and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you, Ashley."

Ashley wouldn't look at her. Helen hated it when they argued, but what should she expect? She'd hardly been the best mother. At least, she never thought she had. She always thought things could be better,_ she_ could be better. Maybe then she'd be able to relate to her daughter?

Ashley waited till her mom left the room, then re-kitted herself up, ready to sneak out. She'd done it a thousand times. She'd prove herself, prove that she could do this.

-

Nikola had stayed at the young woman's side constantly since he found her. Every time she woke she seemed a little bit stronger, but she'd suffered a lot of pain and muscle spasms throughout her arms and legs that crippled her on their onset. Many times he'd had to carry her back to her bed or seat, and she'd been grateful, but she wasn't exactly what you'd call chatty. He was given her thanks and appreciation many times, but he didn't even know her name. Was it possible she was more of a mystery than even _he_ was?

Nevertheless she sat in the chair opposite him sipping at the tea he'd made her. She was supporting her own weight again, and even moved with grace. She seemed a lot better, and he felt certain she was about to move on, leaving him with all his unanswered questions.

She felt him watching her, as he often did. She understood it. She didn't talk to him unless it was necessary. She supposed she could sometimes be harsh, but she'd always had to be, so she could move on easily and avoid possible detection and capture. The thing intriguing her the most at the moment was despite the fact that her being there put Nikola at risk, she had a feeling he could probably deal with the consequences. After all, she'd never been cared for by anyone quite as unique as him before.

Her eyes went dark as she allowed all of her senses to heighten, and she stared intently at him.

"You make me feel like prey when you do that dear." He quipped, but she didn't stop her examination. "Won't you tell me your name?"

"Anya." She said softly. "My name's Anya."

He smirked.

"My name's Nikola." He replied, feeling like he'd just achieved a great deal. "Do you suppose you might need another day to recover from… whatever it is that you were recovering from?"

"No, no I'm okay again."

He seemed disappointed, although he wasn't going to say that. Instead he lowered his eyes to his hands, seeing some dirt under one of his nails and feeling an incredible urge to clean them immediately.

"You're quite sure?"

She studied him a little longer, before replying.

"I have to go… somewhere… tonight. But you could join me, if you liked."

His eyes jumped to hers again. Maybe he would get his questions answered after all?


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter four:**

"Why do you insist on wandering the streets at night? It's not safe."

Anya didn't respond. It was _exactly_ because it wasn't safe that she chose the night to wander the streets. She'd sensed something sinister in the area a few days previously, and although not yet coming into direct contact with it - and having no desire to, she'd managed to make herself useful in other ways. She gave him a resigned glance, as her eyes darkened and her senses heightened, before she looked away from him and continued her search.

"Are you _hunting_ for something?"

She again ignored his question. She'd been drawn to this place, this city. She didn't know why yet, but the emotional pull she was feeling since she'd come here had been extraordinarily stronger than she'd felt before. She would search for it, until she found it, and then she could move on.

"You're not very forthcoming." He teased.

"Back at you,"

"A response," he said with a gleeful smile.

"I didn't bring you with me for your conversation."

"I'm hurt." He mocked looking dejected, which he was happy to see brought a smile to her face.

"Are you always this distracting?" she pried, wanting to learn about his acquaintances and being as subtle as she could about it.

"I've been told I'm an acquired taste."

"That's an understandable statement." She teased him back. He struck her as a lone agent, but there must be someone in his life or there wouldn't have been anyone to make that comment about him. She knew given a little more time she could figure it out of him.

Suddenly she felt something in her gut. A magnetic pull that dictated the next turns she took and the streets she walked. She moved with a sudden swiftness that forced Nikola to change into his vampiric form to keep up with her pace. Her swiftness was an alarming contrast to the barely mobile woman he had met that first evening. He realised without being told the chatter had to end for now. He felt a rush, certain wherever she was headed, he would learn something about her, about what she was and why she was out that night they met.

They heard screaming and she came to an abrupt halt.

"Nikola?" she turned to him, her deep black eyes staring directly into his own black depths. He cocked his head to one side to show she had his attention. "Would it be okay if I were to stay with you a day or so longer?"

He was concerned. She saw it radiating off of him like an invisible fog of emotion.

"It would."

"You're about to get some answers to those questions that have been fogging up your brain."

"You trust me?" he asked suddenly.

"Implicitly." She replied without hesitation.

Whatever it was she saw when she studied people, whatever insight it gave her, for once in his life, someone trusted him without question. Without doubt.

-

"Will?"

Will looked up from his book and saw Helen hovering in his doorway. The morning light that usually added to her own radiance, instead highlighted the tiredness around her eyes, the worry in her features, and the paleness of her skin.

"Magnus?"

She seemed worried. He wondered if she'd finally decided to accept his offer to talk, but somehow it didn't seem likely. She seemed agitated. She seemed fidgety. Her irritation was very different to what he'd seen when he'd mentioned Tesla.

"Have you seen Ashley?" she finally asked, her eyes seeming to beg him to say that he had.

"Um, no, not since yesterday evening. Why? Is everything ok?"

"No, no it is _not_ okay." She sighed, turning to leave. Will quickly got to his feet and caught up with her.

"What's happened?"

She hesitated again, before answering.

"We had a disagreement. She wanted to hunt an abnormal. I asked her not to and I thought we had an understanding but it seems she's sneaked away anyway. She promised me she wouldn't go and she's completely disregarded my warnings to her."

"What sort of abnormal are we talking about?"

"Have you met Zeek?"

"From a distance, yeah."

"That sort."

Will's mouth almost hit the floor.

"You're kidding me."

"I do not kid about such things William."

"We'll look for her." He assured her, closing the space between them and resting a comforting hand on her shoulder. His was happy to see the contact seemed to calm her a little. "Do we know where she's headed?"

"She… she said she'd had a tip off but that was as far as the conversation went when I told her she was not under any circumstances to attempt this."

"You did tell her Zeek _killed_ 5 of the expedition didn't you?"

"Yes Will but she's incorrigible, you know that."

"Do you think she got this tip via your usual sources or… someone else? We could have Henry tap into her private files and search for any irregularities."

She closed her eyes, making herself take a calming breath.

"That wouldn't be a bad idea."

"I'll go find him."

"Will-"

He turned back to her, seeing more fear on her face then he had ever seen before.

"Yeah?"

She opened her mouth to speak, then shook the thought away.

"Move quickly. I have a feeling we don't have much time."


	5. Chapter 5

Special thanks to Miss Pookamonga for your review :) As always, love to hear what people are thinking so feel free to leave a comment :) Here's the next chappy :)

**-**

**Chapter five:**

Helen had made a few phone calls, but so far found out nothing of value. She moved back over to the other side of the room, watching as Henry shut Ashley's laptop.

"Anything?"

Henry shook his head with a sympathetic expression.

"Nothing at all. And if there _was_ something, _I'd_ have found it."

"This is hopeless. You would think she could at least give me a phone call, but no. Heaven forbid what people would think of my parenting skills."

"There's nothing wrong with your parenting skills. You're great." Henry said with a grin.

She returned his smile. He'd been like a surrogate son to her over the years and she loved him dearly. She appreciated his confidence in her, but when it came to Ashley she often doubted herself and her decisions.

"Keep me updated I- I have some things I need to do."

Helen quickly excused herself.

-

Nikola couldn't stop looking at Anya. He couldn't believe what he'd seen her do.

"Does it always make you… unwell?"

Anya nodded.

"In differing severity… dependent on… you know."

"How do you…" he struggled to find the right wording. "When did you first…"

"It doesn't matter." She said simply, thankful she had the energy to hold her own drink this time round. Realising he wasn't going to get his answer, he asked a different question.

"Does anyone else know?"

"I've never shown anyone I didn't have to before, no."

"Why did you show me? What made you think you could trust me?"

"We all have secrets. _You_ have secrets. I see them."

"And it doesn't… scare you?"

"No." she said with a smile.

-

Will found himself standing outside Ashley's room. He'd wanted to see how Helen was, and having not found her in the library or her own room, he figured this was the next most likely place. He knocked gently on the door, getting no response but opening it anyway. Helen was curled up asleep on Ashley's bed. Or so he assumed, until he got closer to her and saw her breathing wasn't quite as slow and steady as it would be if she were truly asleep. He supposed he shouldn't disturb her. She obviously wanted some privacy and it wasn't like he had good news.

He moved quietly towards her, pulling the cover up over her so she wouldn't chill, and gently moving her hair away from her eyes. It wasn't until now he realised at some point she'd been crying. Her eyeliner had been distinctly smudged in an attempt to stop tears escaping. He let out a long sigh, and then left the room again.

Helen opened her eyes, still feeling the tingle from his touch on her face. She was grateful he had accepted she didn't want to talk, and left. She knew he didn't have good news.

She lay there a long while, until Bigfoot came in with some tea, setting her cup down on Ashley's bedside table and sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Drink."

She opened her eyes. There was no kidding anyone these days. She slowly sat herself up and picked up the cup to have a sip.

"Helen, you don't look well."

"I have a bad feeling. A very bad feeling, in my gut. I just want my little girl home safe and sound and I don't think she-"

"Sshh Helen, don't say it," he soothed, lifting one arm around her and pulling her into a hug.

-

"You never stay anywhere for very long do-"

"Enough about me, let's talk about you." She interrupted him, putting her cup down a little too harshly.

"Oh- no no no, that's not how it works."

Her eyes blackened over and he made a noise of irritation.

"Tell me about _her_."

"About who?"

"The woman who thinks you're an acquired taste."

Nikola smirked.

"How do you know it's a woman?"

"If it's a man that's got you so worked up and tense then I'm sorry I misjudged you," she joked.

She never misjudged anyone.

"Oh no- no it's definitely a woman." He said quickly. "And there's nothing really to tell."

"I don't believe that."

He lowered his eyes, thinking about Helen and smiling for a moment.

"She's very important to me."

She could sense just how important this woman was to him. She could read him like a book.

"You're in love with her aren't you."

He shifted uncomfortably under her gaze.

"You know, if you and I are going to keep company with each other, this whole black eyed mind raking thing you do has _got_ to stop."

She grinned, as her eyes returned back to their normal green colour.

"It's not mind raking as you so eloquently put it."

"Well… whatever it is… it puts me off balance."

"Force of habit. Sorry."

He appreciated her apology, although somehow he didn't think it would make her stop doing it.

"She probably thinks I'm dead."

"Well then… she doesn't know what you can survive, does she."

Nikola lowered his gaze.

"Last time I saw her I was an imbecile."

"In what way?"

"It's complicated." He sighed. Her silence told him she wasn't about to speak again till he told her more. "I told her how I felt but… she didn't really react how I'd hoped and I… I was an ass. But I always am, why deviate from the expected path?"

"_I_ don't think you're always an ass; misunderstood maybe but, not an ass. Go see her. Go apologise."

His mind wondered to the moment Helen had realised he was serious in his declaration of love for her. He still remembered the utterly confused look on her face. He remembered every single detail of her face. He remembered where every strand of hair had been around it. Had she really had no idea how strongly he felt towards her?

"I'll go tomorrow."

He was being a coward. He knew it. But he just needed a little longer to think about what he was going to say. That and he didn't feel like he should leave Anya just yet. It was too soon.


	6. Chapter 6

More story :)

-

**Chapter six**

Nikola waited as patiently as he could outside the front door to the Sanctuary. He noticed Will's hesitance to invite him inside, and felt his annoyance level quickly rising. But despite the urge Will had to turn Nikola away, he felt obliged to take him to Helen as he'd requested. It actually might help her to see him, ridding her mind of the worries she might have been having about him being dead. He headed to the library; knocking on the door and hearing Helen shout that he could enter.

"Helen?"

She looked up at his unusual use of her first name, hopeful that he had some news on Ashley. She was more than a little surprised to see one Nikola Tesla standing beside him. She almost dropped the weapons she was organising as she took in the sight of him.

"Nikola? You're- alive?"

Will took note. The dilation of her pupils the biggest give away. The hesitation in her speech and her belief. But there was no doubting she was quite pleased to see Nikola, whether or not she was going to admit to it. There was no mistaking the relief that covered her face the second she had seen him. He was skilled at picking up micro-expressions. They were so telling, in any situation.

"I'm quite alive Helen."

She seemed to snap out of her daze. Her heart was racing, but she quickly remembered the situation. Ashley was missing and in grave danger.

"This really isn't a good time Nikola. Ashley's missing and I'm not sitting around here any longer, I have to do something I- I have to find her." She glanced at Will. "I should have gone with Henry earlier."

"Let me come with you."

She looked back at Nikola with suspicion, zipping up her jacket and picking up her bag. He didn't release her gaze from his own.

Will felt distinctly uncomfortable.

"Couldn't hurt to have another person looking." He offered.

"Very well." She said finally, noting Will's discomfort as she approached both of them.

They had barely made it to the lift when Bigfoot almost ran into them, looking out of breath.

"Helen… come quickly…"

She saw the worry in his eyes and breezed passed Will and Nikola, following without any further questions. Her heart was racing, she'd seen that look before. As she made it to the entranceway her eyes found the blood streaked across the floor, before following its trail to her daughter. Something claw like was sticking out the centre of her chest, she had gashes through both legs and she lay like a ragdoll trying desperately to breathe but no longer being able to get enough air into her lungs.

"Oh my God- Ashley?"

"Mom!" she coughed, and Helen winced at the blood coming out of her mouth. Henry had picked up her scent whilst he was out searching and carried her back.

"Ashley- what- how did-"

Helen was trying not to panic but she could see her daughter was in a very bad condition. She dropped to her knees beside her in shock.

"I'm so sorry,"

"It's ok Ashley, it's going to be ok,"

"I should have listened, I'm sooo, sooo sorry,"

Tears were flowing freely.

"I have to… we have to get this out of you we… I'm going to fix you up." She looked at Bigfoot, wanting him to lift her and get her to their infirmary.

"No-" Ashley groaned in pain. "Please don't move me I- just- don't leave me,"

Helen heard the desperation in her daughter's voice. She knew she couldn't fix this and she was terrified.

"I won't leave you,"

"I don't wanna die," she whispered, setting herself off coughing up even more blood.

"Helen-"

She shot Nikola a look and he could see how devastating this situation was.

"I'll be right back."

He flew out of the door and Helen let out a despairing laugh. It was so like him to flee at the first sign of trouble.

"What can we do?" Will asked, as in shock as everyone else.

"We can't do anything," Helen replied, feeling utterly useless.

"Mom-"

"It's okay,"

Ashley smiled up at her, reaching for her mom's hand and giving it a squeeze.

"It doesn't hurt anymore."

Helen let out a pained sob. That was a very bad sign.

"Ashley I love you,"

"I love you too," she said weakly, feeling the world around her starting to slip away.

-

Nikola flew through the streets at lightening speed, reaching the current hotel he'd been staying at and quickly returning to human form before dashing inside and up the stairs.

"Anya?"

She was at the door as he went in the room.

"Niko-?"

"You- can you- are you able to-"

"I can help, this is what I was drawn to this place for. Take me to her."

Nikola nodded, taking her hand and pulling her out of the door.

-

Helen didn't want to let Ashley go. Her body was limp in her arms and her last breath had left her bloodied mouth, but she didn't want to let her go. She wanted to hold on to every last bit of warmth. She couldn't bring herself to accept her daughter had died, and she felt like it was all her fault.

"Helen,"

She wasn't sure when Will had moved to kneel beside her, but he was close to her now, his hands reaching to her to help hold her steady, wanting to offer comfort.

"She- she can't be-"

"Helen, it's not your fault," he offered, reading the guilt in her broken eyes, seeing her shatter slowly in front of him.

"I- this-" she couldn't speak. She couldn't think straight. She just sobbed, lowering Ashley to the floor and crunching up in tears over her body.

Will tried to comfort her, tried to calm her, but he didn't know how to help. She'd just lost the most important thing in her life and it was killing her.

Everyone was in a state of shock, only Will was able to look at this with any clarity in his mind. And weighing everything up, Helen's wellbeing was now considerably compromised. He had to take care of her.

She finally succumbed to him, collapsing against his embrace and clinging onto him for dear life as she sobbed heart wrenching sobs.

"Don't fall apart on me Helen," he whispered, gently stroking her hair with one hand and holding her with the other.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter seven:**

Nikola reached the Sanctuary with Anya in tow, and he was about to reach for the door when she stopped him, looking up at him with seriousness.

"You mustn't leave me here. I can't stay here. Promise me you'll take me back to the hotel. It's all I ask."

"You have my word."

They opened the door, and Nikola could literally feel his heart breaking when he saw how devastated Helen was. And despite the situation, he felt a pang of jealousy at her being in Will's embrace.

"Helen," he said sounding out of breath.

She pulled back from Will's arms and shot Nikola an icy look.

"Why the hell have you come back!" She snapped, getting to her feet and lunging at him.

"I can help,"

"You're too late!" she sobbed.

"It's not too late Helen. I've bought someone to help. I promise you, it's not too late. Trust me, please," he pleaded as he held her struggling arms to stop her lashing out anymore. Suddenly she felt a hand on her arm and her frustration seemed to dissipate.

"It's okay. I can help your daughter."

Anya let go and knelt down behind Ashley, pulling her up onto her lap and taking hold of the dead woman's hands in her own. Lifelines to lifelines. She assessed the situation. How many lives would be destroyed by this young woman's death?

Too many.

She sighed, glancing up at Helen, her black eyes meeting blue as she searched for the fate of the older woman. Heartbreak. Despair. Hope… shattered… and her life? destroyed. She wouldn't live without her daughter. The guilt alone would kill her within the year.

Her eyes moved now to Will. He'd feel like he'd failed Helen. He'd feel like a failure for not being able to help her cope with Ashley's death. He'd feel despair because he had feelings for her that ran a little deeper than they ought to.

She didn't have to even look at Tesla to know how Helen's breakdown would affect him. Exile. Loneliness. Regret. Anger… and frustration, leading to the darkest plans and behaviour he had ever had; all because he couldn't have the woman that he loved, because she'd despise him. She would come to blame him because it was easier to deal with then to blame herself.

She eyed the Sanctuary around her, sensing the lives there that had been given meaning, the lives that were protected both inside and outside these walls. It would fall apart without Helen. A century's worth of work, would amount to nothing.

Chaos would ensue.

And so she set to work, happy with the knowledge she was saving more than one life. This was a productive job for her. She slowed her breathing right down and concentrated. She closed her eyes, and her whole body started to glow.

Helen worried for a moment the young woman was going nuclear, but she just waited, somehow trusting her straight away with whatever she was doing for her daughter. She knew Nikola was whispering something of comfort to her, but she couldn't quite make out what it was. Several minutes passed, and the glow slowly engulfed Ashley's limp form, until Anya opened her eyes and stared across at Helen. The dark black of her eyes turned to an astonishing crystal green. The glow faded, and Ashley suddenly took a sharp breath inwards. The claw through her chest had been expelled to the floor, and the wounds where the creature had shredded through her skin- the wounds she had been covered in were now fully healed.

"Mom-" she panicked. She knew she'd been taking too many risks. It was her own fault she'd been attacked so violently, but she couldn't understand. Was this heaven?

"Ashley?!" Helen said with utter amazement. How was it possible? She stopped the thinking, relishing in the fact her daughter was alive again, and quickly leaving Nikola's embrace. She knelt down beside her daughter, pulling her towards her, hugging her so tightly Ashley was afraid she might break some bones.

"Mom! I can't breathe!" she joked.

"You're alive," she whispered, delighted tears running down her face as she loosened her grip on her just a little.

"How?" Ashley whispered, pulling back from her mom's embrace and feeling over the place in her chest where she'd felt the claws of the creature go in and not come out again. It had hurt like a bitch, but now there was nothing. It was like she'd never been hurt at all. There wasn't even a scratch on her.

Helen suddenly remembered the young woman who had saved her life, realising she was no longer sat opposite them. She wasn't far. She was stood by Nikola as she crumpled and collapsed into his embrace.

"Oh my God," she gasped, knowing this was an abnormal in need of her help. She was overjoyed about her daughter's living, but she felt she had to help this woman.

"Can't stop Helen," Nikola said with a warm smile, as he lifted Anya up and backed up towards the doorway.

"Nikola wait-"

"I have to go, I'll be in touch,"

She felt the urge to follow them, but she wasn't leaving her daughter after all that had happened that evening. She would speak to Tesla in due course.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter eight**

Will was watching Ashley with great concern. Since her ordeal, something didn't seem right with her. It was to be expected he supposed, but it worried him nonetheless. She seemed to keep actively seeking the proximity of her mother. Not unusual for a small child, whose curiosity about the world tempted them to wander away, and whose fear of the unknown kept them returning for comfort. However, this behaviour was unusual for a 23 year old woman. Especially _this_ 23 year old woman.

He was pleased at least to see that Helen didn't seem to mind Ashley's sudden clinginess. Whatever issues she might have had concerning her ability to relate to her daughter; whatever problems there had been, it didn't seem to matter anymore. Their bond seemed to be stronger, and Ashley's trust in her mother seemed to have grown considerably.

There was something unspoken going on between them, but Helen didn't seem to feel the need to bring it to the surface. There was a strange atmosphere in the Sanctuary, that was for sure.

-

Night came quickly, and Helen felt an incredible urge to visit Ashley and sit with her whilst she slept. It was as though she needed to check she was really alive, and that it wasn't a fantasy her mind was offering her up to help her cope.

She knew it wouldn't do her daughter any good though. She couldn't suddenly wrap her up in cotton wool. If she crowded her, she'd never regain her confidence in herself. So instead, she went to her own room, climbing into bed and trying to sleep at a decent time. She supposed she might have stayed up longer but the way Will had been looking at her told her she could expect an interrogation from him about her feelings pretty soon.

"Mom?"

Helen turned over, flicking the lamp on and seeing Ashley stood in the doorway.

"What is it sweetheart?"

Ashley shuffled across to her mom's bed and stared at the empty side somewhat expectantly.

"Can I stay in here tonight?"

Helen's mind flashed back to when Ashley was younger, and would have a nightmare then crawl into bed beside her and sob. She'd always wished she could make the bad dreams disappear, as did any mother, but fortunately her presence had always seemed to be enough to make things better.

"Of course." She said simply, pulling the cover back and watching Ashley climb in and snuggle up to her.

They were silent for a long while, and then Ashley spoke.

"I'm so sorry mom, really, I should have listened-"

"It doesn't matter anymore. You're alive."

"It _does_ matter-"

"No it doesn't. You made a mistake. I made mistakes when I was your age too. It's okay to get it wrong sometimes."

"It was a pretty _huge_ mistake." She sniffled. Ashley wasn't one to cry – or at least she hadn't been. She'd somehow grown to deal with her problems and upsets in private, like her mom. Until now it seemed. "I never took you seriously. I never trusted you and I should have, you're my mom for christ's sake-"

"Promise me you'll trust me in future,"

"I promise."

"That's all I need. You don't have to feel bad about this, honestly Ashley."

"I'm sorry." She whispered again, snuggling closer.

"Go to sleep. It'll all seem better in the morning."

-

Will boiled the kettle for the third time. He'd kept intending to make himself a coffee and then walking away and forgetting about it. Helen wasn't one to sleep in, but there was always a first for everything he supposed.

He poured the hot water into his favourite mug, stirring it till it frothed on top and taking it over to the table. He'd barely read the first page of the newspaper when he saw Helen enter the kitchen out of the corner of his eye.

"Good morning, William."

"Morning."

His paper quickly lost its appeal as he closed it and turned to face Helen more.

"Did you sleep well?"

"Um, yeah, considering. Did you?"

"Yes, thank you." She said with a reassuring smile. She made herself a cup of tea and sat herself down opposite him. "I'm worried about Ashley."

She hoped directing the conversation to Ashley would deter him from asking her how _she_ was.

"You want me to talk to her?"

Helen wrapped her hands around her cup to warm them, staring down like the liquid inside would have her answers.

"Not yet." She sighed. "I'm worried she isn't going to trust her own judgment anymore; and having no faith in yourself can be just as dangerous as having too much."

"True but… maybe she just needs a little time. I'm sure she'll get through this okay. She's a strong person."

"Hmmm."

She looked pensive.

"How about you?" She didn't respond immediately, and Will found himself saying something else before he properly thought it through. "I thought I was losing you, you know?"

Her eyes flicked quickly back up to his, full of confusion.

"Excuse me?"

He realised he may have said a little more than was appropriate, and quickly gave her an explanation.

"When she died… you did too didn't you… for a little while."

Her confusion quickly left her, and she returned her gaze to the inside of her cup.

"I suppose I did. It's all a bit of a haze."

"I didn't know how I was going to help you."

"Well, fortunately that never became an issue."

"No. No I suppose not."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter nine:**

Helen felt a sudden nervousness as she lifted her hand to knock on Nikola's room door. She found herself wondering how often he chose to stay in hotels. How many times in those 60 odd years he'd disappeared off the face of the earth, had a hotel like this one been his temporary home?

"Pull yourself together," she quietly scolded herself, gently knocking on the door and waiting for his answer.

"Helen," he greeted her, his eyes taking in her entire form with appreciation as she entered the room.

Her eyes now avoided his at all costs, finding he was quickly becoming quite a distraction to her, and instead her gaze landed on the young woman in his care.

She had been practically immobilised for four days. She'd drunk plenty of water but hadn't been able to cope with food. Nikola had thought she was sick last time, but at least she was feeling slightly better and walking around by day two. This time was much worse, it was worrying, and it had prompted him to turn to Helen for assistance.

"This is the girl who- saved Ashley's life."

"Indeed it is."

Helen just stared in awe for a moment, realising in her heart she had stumbled upon someone quite remarkable.

"She hasn't eaten at all?"

"No." Nikola shook his head. Helen sensed a concern from him that she wasn't used to. "She assures me, the moments when she's conscious, she'll be quite alright. But I- well- look at her."

Anya looked deathly ill.

"I'd like to take her back to the Sanctuary with me."

"I completely understand where you're coming from, but if it's alright with you, I assured her she would stay here whilst she was recovering. She was quite insistent on it."

"Does she know who I am?"

Nikola wasn't sure how to answer, so he stayed quiet.

"Nikola, how- where did you find her?"

He let out a laugh.

"Wandering _my_ streets at night. She was in a similar state, but she recuperated very quickly."

"You just… took her in?"

He nodded.

"There's something special about her Helen. I knew the minute I met her you'd be interested. There's something about her that I find extremely… calming and… familiar."

"Me too." Helen replied, looking deep in thought for a moment. She really had to do some research. She sat beside the young woman, taking hold of one of her hands, feeling for her pulse in her wrist. It was strong for someone who looked so close to death. "I've never before come across it Nikola. Resurrection. _Genuine_ resurrection, that's what she did. Not the parlour trick you do. Ashley was d-" she took a breath. She couldn't make herself say it.

"Dead." Nikola finished for her.

Helen nodded.

"Clearly her gift comes at a price. I suspect she outdid herself with Ashley. I'm eternally grateful to her but if she were to stay like this, if she didn't recover-" she stopped herself short again. Getting emotional would do her no good.

"She'll be just fine." Nikola said with certainty, moving closer to Helen and offering his arms to her. She was still shocked by the events of the passed few days. It had completely unnerved her, giving her a sense of the utter grief she could feel at the loss of her daughter, and making her question whether or not bringing her into the world had been the right decision, or a selfish one.

She cautiously stood up before him, hesitating only for a moment before leaning into his embrace and letting him hold her for a while.

"I feel like I should thank _you_ too,"

"Really? A thank you, for _me_?" he teased with his air of self-confidence.

"Seriously Nikola. If you hadn't taken her in and cared for her she might never have been up to saving Ashley's life. Saving _my_ life."

"It was nothing," he said with a grin. "But appreciation with a kiss wouldn't be rejected."

She laughed against him softly, pulling back but not obliging.

"If I kissed you again you may try and kill me again." Before he could respond she'd moved away and was studying Anya again. "She needs to come back with me. She needs some sort of sustenance and she isn't getting that here."

"She trusts me Helen, and I promised her I wouldn't leave her at the Sanctuary with you-"

"You haven't broken that promise. You _didn't_ leave her. I want to help her Nikola, you must understand I can do that better than you. I have the resources."

Her wide eyes pleaded with him. Did she know when she looked at him like that she could probably get him to do anything?

"If I agree…" he saw the gleam in her eyes that told him she knew she'd won him over. "I would need to stay at the Sanctuary. With her. With you."

"Okay." She said with a smile. "I always have a room prepared for guests."

-

A/N: I'm away on holiday this evening so I won't be able to update for about a week as I won't have internet access. So do not worry readers - I'm not abandoning this story, it's just being put on hold for a little while :)


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for the reviews :)

-

**Chapter ten:**

After checking out the guest room and being pleasantly surprised by the welcome he'd received from Henry and Ashley, Nikola headed to see Anya. She wouldn't be best pleased when she woke up, so he wanted to be there for her to reassure her she was safe.

When he got to her room, Helen was leaning over her checking on something. He found his eyes drifting down to rest on her rear end for a moment or two, and smiled to himself.

"How is she?"

"She's doing okay, considering." Helen replied without turning to face him.

"I wanted to be here when she woke up. If I'm not… getting in the way."

"Not at all." This time she peered at him over her shoulder and gave him a smile. "I've just about finished for now. I'm just waiting on some test results."

"Tests?"

His question came out like an accusation, but Helen saw from the expression on his face he hadn't meant it to.

"Just blood tests. I think she might be anaemic, and I'm concerned about the rest of her systems too. What she does obviously takes its toll on her body, I'd be very surprised if there isn't some sort of damage internally."

"Surely she'd just heal herself?" Nikola replied, sitting himself down in the chair beside Anya's bed and getting comfortable.

"It will do us no good to make assumptions about her abnormality Nikola."

She gathered up some of her diagnostic equipment and headed to the doorway. She hesitated, turning to look back at him as he sat loyally next to Anya. She found her eyes roaming over his frame, and her mind wandered for a moment as she imagined ruffling his hair and…

"Hey mom."

"Ah- Ashley?"

"How's she doing?"

"She's alright." She took in her daughter's attire and quickly realised she planned on going out somewhere. "Will you be back in time for dinner?"

"I-" she let out a laugh that seemed almost nervous. "I'm just going shopping and… I was thinking you could come with me?"

"Oh-"

"I thought we should do more… normal… mother daughter stuff. I mean… if you wanted to. I know you're busy a lot, and I-"

"I'd like that."

Ashley beamed.

"Great."

-

Anya started to stir. She knew before she opened her eyes she was at the Sanctuary. The place had a certain feel to it.

"Anya?"

She heard the apprehension in his voice.

"You promised me you wouldn't leave me here."

"I didn't. I took you back to the hotel."

"Then you bought me here."

Her eyes opened and she glared at him.

"It's been four days. I was worried about you."

"I told you I'd be fine."

He shifted uneasily under her gaze.

"I get the impression you're angry with me."

"Well observed."

"I was only doing what I thought was right."

"You mean, you were sweet talked because you're smitten with her?"

"I am not… _smitten_."

"Huh… sure."

"You can trust her. She knows what she's doing. She only wants to help you, you must know that."

Her glare softened, and she looked away from him.

"I know."

"So why are you so concerned about being here?"

"Are you kidding? This place is like a sweet shop for the Cabal. Why are you _not_ concerned?"

"I wasn't aware you knew about the Cabal,"

"I know enough."

"Helen can protect you from them. That's one of the reasons she invests so much time in the Sanctuary. Take a look around you. Take a look at the other residents here. Take a good long look at Helen and you'll see it for yourself."

"I don't doubt for a second that she has good intentions."

"But?"

"Sometimes that's not enough."

There was an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, and Anya felt like maybe she was being too harsh on him. Nikola's lack of a response made her want to smooth things over. Sure he'd bought her here despite her telling him she didn't want to stay there, but he was here with her. She knew her fears of the Cabal were sometimes a little irrational. She knew she could be quite safe here. The real fear was that she'd get too comfortable and want to stay. And she couldn't stay anywhere. She just put people around her in danger by doing that.

"I'm not angry at you. Not really."

"I didn't want to upset you, I just wanted you to get better."

"I know. I do feel a little better. I'm just… afraid."


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you for reviewing :)

-

**Chapter eleven:**

Bigfoot never had quite managed to take to Nikola, but considering recent events he had decided to try and be more pleasant to him. That being said, he was irritated to find the half-vampire in his kitchen.

"What are you doing?"

He approached one of the pans on the cooker and peered inside.

"I'm cooking." Nikola replied matter of factly.

Bigfoot let out a grunt of disapproval.

"Cooking?"

"Helen's had a rough week. I thought it would be a nice surprise for her." He paused, looking deep in thought. "There were times when we were at Oxford, when she allowed me the pleasure of her company in the evening. John wasn't aware of our meetings." He smiled to himself. "Despite people's narrowmindedness at a woman being allowed to study, she always kept herself composed in public. Some days I guess it bothered her more, and she'd come and talk to me about it. I wanted her to understand I didn't agree with the gender stereotypes. So I thought of something I could do that only a woman was expected to. I learnt to cook, and I only cooked for _her_. This dish was one of her favourites."

Bigfoot lifted the lid off the pan and sniffed the air above it. He wasn't interested in small talk, albeit it quite revealing small talk.

"Hmmm."

When he walked away without another word Nikola wondered if that was a good sign or a bad one. Then he decided he didn't much care for his approval. He knew what he was doing.

-

When Helen and Ashley returned they were laden with bags. Most of the items were for Ashley, but her daughter deserved a little spoiling once in a while. They'd had lunch out and the day had passed quickly. It was only now she was home she realised how long they'd been gone.

"Something smells good." Ashley said with an eager smile. She looked at Bigfoot expectantly, knowing he sometimes liked to indulge in some home cooking, but he just shrugged at her. She followed the smell and saw Nikola setting the table in the dining room. "Wow. I didn't expect _you_."

"Charming."

"It does smell good though."

Nikola smirked.

"I'm about ready to serve if you'd like to call everyone through." Ashley plonked herself down at the table, and pulled out her mobile phone. "You're not honestly going to phone them when they're in the same house are you?" He asked with disbelief.

"Hey, it's a big house." She said with a grin. "Mom? Yeah vampy's cooked for us…. All of us yeah… Um who cares it smells good… Okay see you in a minute… b-bye." She hung up and started drumming her hands on the table. Nikola couldn't hide his annoyance at the impatient gesture, and neither was he impressed at Ashley's nickname for him. But instead of commenting, he held his tongue and headed back into the kitchen to start serving up.

-

Helen felt a smile creep onto her face. Nikola had cooked. She found herself thinking back to her time at Oxford. The first time he'd cooked for her she'd been surprised to say the least. She'd never have dreamt of moaning about her day to John. He was a possible suitor for her, and he would not find that behaviour attractive. But she could moan to Nikola. He didn't seem to mind. He'd been a comfort many an evening.

She continued down the corridor to Anya's room, but hesitated. She could hear their conversation. She knew it wouldn't be long before Will went to speak to her.

"I just, help people and… move on. I'm not really needed after… you know? Don't get me wrong, the gratitude I'm shown… people have wanted me to stay with them for life but I just put them in danger."

"I'm sure that's not entirely true-"

"You don't understand."

Will winced at her irritation.

"I'm sorry."

"No I- I'm sorry. I know you're trying to understand, but you just don't. Every time I stay anywhere for too long they always find me."

"The Cabal?"

She nodded.

"I've seen what they want me for, what they'd make me do, and I won't accept it. They've hurt people that I've grown to care about. I always end up alone, I'm just cutting out the middle part. The part where I make friends and then lose them. It's easier this way."

"How is this _easier_?"

She sensed the sympathy and care in his voice, and she knew she was being off with him, but this was how she had to be. This was the way it was. She'd let the rules she made for herself slip with Nikola, seeing a sadness and resignation in him that she recognised in herself. But she couldn't let things slip again.

She could see Will was struggling. He was an observer. He was a thinker. He found the clues and pieced them together, but she wasn't giving him anything concrete to work with.

"I can't stay here." She said finally.

"You can. There's a place for you here. You _can_ be safe."

"Even if I could, how many lives would be lost? I travel around because there are always more people I can help. It's so tiring… playing God…" she shrugged. Her eyes went black and she lifted them to his, searching inside him. "People have asked me what right it is of mine to decide who lives and dies. It's my right because it's _my_ ability. The things that I've sacrificed to keep on doing this… it's just who I am. You adapt to it like you would with any situation."

"There's more to you than your ability. You have to remember that."

"What is it you see when you look at people Will? What do you see when you look at me? You try to figure people out, right? So you can connect with them? So that you can help them?"

"Yeah I- I guess."

"I don't have to try." She shrugged. "Everything's laid bare to me, I just look and I see it. I know I can stay here. I know you have a heart of gold. You want to help me so badly it hurts you. You want to help everyone. That's _your_ gift. You see beyond boundaries and then you work out what it is you're seeing. But you can't understand _me_ without my permission. And I can see it's got you puzzled."

"Am I such an open book?" He asked in awe.

"It might seem wonderful. When you have this insight, you can see some beautiful things, but you have to know you can see some really terrifying things too. Nothing's hidden from me."

"Is it like… a defense?"

"I know who I can trust and who I can't. So… I guess it keeps me safe. As safe as possible given my circumstances."


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter twelve:**

Helen gently knocked on the door, not wanting to interrupt but dinner was waiting and she had to admit she was rather looking forwards to it.

"Sorry, dinner's being served William."

"Dinner?" he looked a little puzzled. "You only just got home right?"

"Ah, yes, Nikola cooked."

William gave Anya a regretful look, one that seemed to promise he'd be back to talk to her later, then stood to leave.

"How are you feeling?"

Anya's eyes were already on Helen, shifting their gaze ever so slightly as she had that good look at her that Nikola had told her to.

"I'm feeling a lot better, thank you."

"Do you think you might manage dinner? I can take that IV out. I imagine it's not too comfortable for you."

"Could I eat in here?"

Despite her increasing desire to incorporate Anya into her little family, she knew that wasn't what Anya wanted. Not yet at least.

"Of course. I'll have someone bring it up for you."

She moved closer to remove the line from Anya's hand.

"If you really want to learn about me, its when I'm like this that you should be doing your tests."

Helen frowned as she looked into Anya's wide black eyes. She still found them enchanting rather than horrifying. She couldn't hide her fascination with the girl, obviously. But that wasn't all it was.

"I don't just see you as a test subject, Anya."

"I know."

There was an awkward silence, and Helen made her way to the door to leave.

"What are you going to do about Nikola and Will?"

"I don't understand." she replied turning back to face her.

"One of them is falling in love with you, and the other one has already fallen. Can't you see it?"

Helen felt her heart racing. She lowered her gaze. She knew Nikola was in love with her. He'd told her but she'd never quite accepted it. Then he'd threatened to kill her that same day. But Will? Falling for her? She hadn't seen that one coming. Sure there were sparks between them, she'd flirted with him, she'd even strongly entertained a one night stand… or two. But she never for a second thought he might feel anything deeper for her. Especially considering her age. She supposed his professionalism with her made him hide it well.

At least Nikola had been one of the few people she could say had lived as long as she had.

Before she realised it, Anya was standing directly in front of her, searching her eyes with intent.

"Nikola really does love you. I know you struggle to believe it. I know it unnerves you because of what he's become and what he tried to do. But he's still the same person underneath it all. I can see it. When I look at him. _Really_ look at him. And he never would have killed you that day, despite the threat. He'd have killed himself by doing that and he isn't stupid. Nor is he ready to die."

Helen felt her heart rate increasing. Did this altered state Anya slipped so easily in and out of make her somehow more perceptive? How on earth was that possible? She cursed herself in her mind. She had seen many amazing things in her life, why did this surprise her so much? Maybe it wasn't surprise. She was feeling unnerved because for the first time in many years there was someone who seemed to see right through her barriers. Someone who saw more in her than even Will managed too.

Anya saw the confusion and fear in Helen's eyes. She'd known how Nikola felt before being told but she seemed determined not to act on the knowledge. She seemed determined to be alone in that respect.

"I know what it's like to love someone, to lose them and shut your heart off. Stop it happening again. But when you live as long as _you_ have, doing that's too dangerous. How long did you really expect to keep it up?"

Helen's thoughts quickly drifted to John. She hadn't completely shut herself off since she broke off the engagement... had she? She'd had men in her life. She had no desire to talk about this any longer though.

"You're food will be up shortly." she said abruptly, and turned again to leave.

"Helen?"

Helen didn't move from the doorway, but this time she refused to turn around.

"I don't claim to know what happened, all those years ago. But something _did_ happen, and it wasn't your fault. You've punished yourself for long enough."

"You didn't see what the man I loved turned into."

"I don't need to. I can see what it did to you. Stop blaming yourself for something you couldn't control."

-

Dinner went smoothly, and Helen had found herself increasingly unable to draw her attention away from Nikola. This didn't go unnoticed by Will, but he refrained from commenting.

-

Helen had waited till everyone had gone to bed, then approached Nikola's room and gently tapped on the door.

"Enter."

"I wasn't sure if you'd still be awake. You retired to bed earlier then I expected."

"Well, as you can see, I'm still very awake. I went to see how Anya was first. I do believe she's forgiven me."

"I wanted to say thank you again, for dinner."

He eyed her curiously, wondering if she was going to enter his room or just stay in the doorway. When she produced some wine and two glasses from behind her back, he smiled an invitation, watching as she shut the door behind her and came to join him on the end of his bed.

"Is it still your favourite?"

"Yes." She poured them both a drink. "It brings back memories."

"Do you remember the first time we drank wine together?"

Helen smiled. She remembered it only too well.

"I'd never had it before."

"You were merry rather quickly."

"If I hadn't been you wouldn't have gotten away with kissing me."

"It was just a peck." He defended himself. He'd made a decision that night. From then on he vowed to himself to steal kisses from her at every opportunity. It had never turned into anything more than the flirtation that it was. But that hadn't stopped him from trying.

"I remember my father telling me you were a bad influence."

"You liked it though." He flirted.

"Yes. I think I rather did."

He watched as she downed the wine in her glass in a manner not befitting a lady, then stood to leave.

"Not staying for another?"

He fancied he saw regret in her eyes.

"I have to check on some of my patients before I go to bed, including Anya."

"How did her blood tests look?"

"Ah, all normal, amazingly."

"I don't want to say I told you so, but I am a genius remember."

She smiled, and left the room.


	13. Chapter 13

Thank you so much for the reviews :)

-

**Chapter 13**

"You wanna do something?"

Anya looked up from the book she'd been reading, and saw Ashley standing staring at her.

"Like what?"

"I dunno. You go out right? You wanna go out?"

"You don't have to be friends with me because I helped you."

"That's not why I'm asking. In case you didn't realise, I don't really have many friends. I don't get much time for them."

"I know."

Ashley frowned.

"Yeah what is it with that? The whole… _knowing_ thing? I don't know what you talked to mom about last night but you managed to freak her out. And believe me, it takes a _lot_ to freak _my_ mom out."

She sat on Anya's bed and sighed loudly, making Anya shut her book and give her her full attention.

"You haven't worked since that creature attacked you have you."

"Mom hasn't really needed me for anything."

"Is that what she told you?"

"Well… not exactly." Ashley shrugged, playing with a loose string on her jeans. "She did ask if I wanted to help her with something the other day but… I just… I wasn't ready. It's not like she really _needed_ my help. It was an easy job."

"You shouldn't be afraid to go back out and do what you've been doing for years."

Ashley pulled a face.

"Don't turn into Will on me. I've had the whole pep talk from him. I'm not giving anything up, I'm just not ready yet. I did_ die_, you know."

"That's probably why she wanted to start you back with something easy. Whether you believe it or not, you're good at what you do. You just have to be more cautious – especially following up anonymous tip offs."

"I just wanted to prove myself to her."

"You don't need to. She's your mom. She knows what you're capable of."

"We get anonymous tip offs all the time."

"And you ran it by your mom first because…"

"Because she's been around longer than I have. She generally knows which leads to follow and which ones to avoid."

"Really?" she said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Point made, honestly. I'm not gonna ignore her advice again."

-

"What did you come to see me about?"

Nikola turned away from the window to find Helen stood directly behind him.

"When?"

"When Will bought you upstairs to see me – you looked like you'd come for a specific reason."

"I just wanted to see you." He was holding back. Anya's words echoed in his mind and he decided to get a grip. "I wanted to apologise for what happened. For… you know… threatening to kill you and all."

"Would you have killed me?" Helen asked plainly. She already knew the answer, but she didn't see any harm in making him squirm a little.

Nikola's face softened and his eyes focused on her intently.

"No. I was aggravated that you weren't going to join me but… I'd never have done it. I'd never have hurt you like that. I may have done some misguided things in my time, but killing you is never going to be one of them. I know I was bitter with you, but I meant what I said."

"That you love me?"

Nikola coughed looking a little flustered.

"You always did like to get straight to the point didn't you Helen."

"Answer me Nikola. Truthfully."

Nikola took a mental snapshot of her expression. It was fragile, it was nervous, it was full of uncertainty. She was laying herself bare with that one look as her blue eyes darted between his, trying to read him. Needing the truth.

"Yes I love you." He half whispered it. "Always… _always_ have Helen." Last time he'd confessed his love she hadn't taken him seriously, but this time she seemed to. He lifted his hand to her face, noticing this time round she didn't recoil from him. The confusion seemed to be gone. He gently stroked down her cheek, letting his hand rest on her neck and feeling her pulse racing. He held her attention for a moment, then she looked away from him. She almost swatted his hand away from her neck, a look of distress suddenly covering her face.

"If that's true then why did you disappear off the face of the earth for 60 years Nikola?"

"What did you expect me to do? I was supposed to be dead-"

"I expected you to turn up on my doorstep. To want my help. To want… something… anything. I was feeling so disconnected. I hated what John had become, the way he behaved with me. I felt different with you. I still do. I guess that I always wondered how it might have been different if I'd made different choices Nikola… I don't know what I expected but I didn't expect you to just disappear."

"I came back didn't I? Because I need you in my life I-"

"Did you honestly expect this to be so easy?"

"No. Never. But I still wanted you to know how I felt, how I missed you, how pissed off I was at John for the way he hurt you."

She sighed closing her eyes for a moment then looking at the ground between them.

"He really hurt me." She almost whispered, as though finally admitting the truth.

"You know, you make out like you're so in control but do you think no-one notices when you're hurting? I always did. I hated seeing you like that and not being able to make things better. I needed time to come to terms with the way I changed as well you know. I had to learn about what I'd become, about what it meant, I had to _understand_ it. But there was no doubt in my mind once I'd thought things over and accepted them and made some decisions I was always going to seek you out. I'm sorry it took 60 years but you know me."

"I do." She said with a knowing smile, looking back up at him and feeling an ache in her heart for him, her anger quickly dissipating.

"And you know, as much as it pained me to accept it I could see you still loved him. You still do now to some extent don't you?" She wouldn't answer him, but that was an answer enough. "For all I knew you'd get back together despite it all. He'd be back in your bed because it was easier then facing facts."

"He destroyed my heart Nikola and nothing he does to try and make up for his behaviour will fix it. I'll never allow him in my bed again."

He saw the anguish in her features, but he also saw the certainty of her decision. John would never be her lover again. He could never be more than an associate now – for Ashley's sake and no-one elses. She didn't care what he tried to do to put things right between them. He was the first person she fell in love with, so there'd always be a place in her heart that couldn't let him go. But her love for him had faded considerably, and she wasn't going to shut other people out forever.

"Can I fix your heart?" he asked carefully, closing the gap between them and reaching to her again.

"It's possible, yes." She said, turning into his touch and closing her eyes. "You disconnected yourself too, didn't you?"

"From everyone but you." His other hand lifted to tangle in her hair, gently rubbing at the back of her neck as she leant into him for a hug. "Tell me what you need Helen," he urged, one hand running down her back and back up again in a gentle caress.

"I don't know." She said, sounding unnaturally despairing.


	14. Chapter 14

Thank you so much for the reviews :)

-

**Chapter 14**

She pulled back from him ever so slightly to meet his gaze, then gently pressed her mouth to his for a kiss. Nikola was over the moon. It wasn't one of the stolen ones he'd managed to get from her in the past, but a proper, meaningful kiss.

Helen's heart fluttered. A flutter she'd only ever felt with John all those years ago. Sure she'd had lovers over the years but she'd never found that special feeling again. She'd never been searching for it, merely yearned the contact and comfort of a man's arms. But she was feeling it now, and it terrified her.

Nikola felt her hesitation, and pulled her closer towards him as they kissed again. She let out a low moan into his mouth, as her hands reached up to him and wrapped around his neck. He felt himself stirring, trying as hard as he could to suppress his vampiric side but he was getting excited, and self-control was becoming increasingly difficult.

His frustration translated into his actions and he walked her backwards suddenly, pushing her against the wall and kissing her more passionately. She didn't seem to mind, instead clinging onto his shirt and holding him close to her.

It was exhilarating. She'd always known kissing Nikola Tesla like this would be. But she wasn't about to rush head first into anything. She pulled back just far enough to take a breath, and gave him a shy smile. She realised what it was she needed, she needed to stop shutting people out. She needed to give someone her heart again, and she was certain she could trust Nikola with it.

"I don't want to rush into this Nikola," she said honestly.

"I have no intention of rushing this Helen, I've waited over a century, don't think impatience is going to let me down now."

She felt herself blushing, releasing her grip on his shirt and smoothing out the creases for him.

"Right, well," she cleared her throat. "Now that's… been discussed… I have work to do."

"One more," he said quickly, kissing her squarely on the mouth. Before he realised what was happening someone pushed him away and Helen disappeared before his eyes. "Lunatic." Nikola muttered under his breath, knowing who it was straight away.

-

Helen's momentary giggling was quickly halted. She was furious at John's behaviour and as soon as she realised he'd only teleported them to the roof she shoved him away from her.

"What on earth do you think you're playing at John!"

"Stopping you from making a mistake."

"What business is it of yours? You have no right to tell me what's a mistake and what isn't. You think I've never made a mistake before? Is your memory that short? It's up to me what I do, not you."

"And you really thinking kissing _Tesla_ is a good idea?"

"I've kissed him before."

"Wh-" John was speechless for a moment. He looked furious. "I'm telling you Helen, steer clear of him,"

"Or else what?"

Suddenly the door opened as Will came out onto the roof, not realising he'd be interrupting anything. He'd come up here to think, finding comfort in the fact that Helen came up here to do the same thing. He hadn't expected to see her and John up there.

"Sorry I- didn't realise-"

He started to turn to leave.

"Will, come here." she demanded.

And he obeyed, approaching her somewhat nervously. He didn't have to know details to see that Helen was beyond pissed off.

"Are you okay Magnus?"

"I'm afraid I have to apologise to you."

"What for?"

"This." She said before pulling him towards her and planting a passionate kiss on his mouth. Although alarmed for all of a nanosecond, Will quickly responded to her, his hands weaving into her hair and holding her firmly to him.

"Helen this is ridiculous." John snapped.

She broke the kiss despite Will's reluctance, leaving him with a goofy smile as she turned back to John.

"No John, what's ridiculous is the notion that you have control over anything I choose to do. I'll kiss _who_ I want to, and _when_ I want to. Is that clear?"

He flashed off without further response, and she turned back to Will with a coy smile.

"I am sorry Will, I needed to make a point to him."

"I ah-" he laughed nervously, remembering her body moulded up against his and her mouth… her lovely… soft… "Anytime you need to make a point I'll be _happy_ to oblige."

She laughed giving him a flirtatious look.

"I'll bear that in mind William."


	15. Chapter 15

Really appreciate the comments :) Here's the next chapter :)

-

**Chapter 15:**

Will watched as she left the rooftop, one thought occupying his mind…

_wow_...

He sighed, forgetting what he'd come up here to think about in the first place.

-

Helen headed back inside, approaching the room she'd been so rudely teleported out of, and hearing the distinct sound of John's voice as he argued with Nikola.

"She can do soooo much better than you, you smarmy piece of-"

"What you think you're a better choice? Well, I think we all know how that turned out don't we you lunatic."

Despite wanting to go in and break them up, she hesitated, just for a moment.

"I loved her with all my heart. I got sick but she'll always belong to me-"

"No. You see, _that's_ my point. You never loved her you just wanted to _possess_ her. She was the brightest and prettiest there was at Oxford, so you decided you wanted her. But she's not an object for you to own John, she's so much more than that, and you _still_ can't see it." He laughed as an idea formed in his mind. "Maybe you need another dose of ECT to make you see sense?"

John wasn't threatened by him.

"You're still angry she chose me over you." he replied with a smirk.

"At least I was being myself, I wasn't putting on some act just to get-"

"Stop this, immediately." Helen said bursting into the room. "John, I suggest you leave."

"This is madness Helen! Are you forgetting he tried to kill you?"

"No, John. The point is, he threatens, but he'd never kill me. I _know_ he'd never hurt me. But you? You made these declarations of love, of how you wanted to care for me and you'd never hurt me, but you _did_ hurt me. I wanted to help you and you just kept on-" she took a calming breath. There was no use going over all this again. "I can't feel safe with you John. I'm positive Nikola won't kill me but I can't be positive you won't. Please leave."

He seemed to be considering his options, stay and argue, or leave as she requested.

"It might surprise you, but I came to see my daughter."

"Funny, I didn't realise this was _Ashley's_ room." Nikola teased. Ashley was obviously an after thought.

"I heard about what happened. Please Helen, at least allow me this."

"Not today."

"Today doesn't work for me either," Nikola teased further, feeling very smug when John flickered out of sight.

"Wipe that smile off your face Nikola,"

He did as he was told. He could feel smug and hide it.

"Sorry."

She sighed.

"The day was going so well until he appeared."

"Don't let it spoil anything." He suggested, reaching for one of her hands and pulling her closer to him.

"I do wish you wouldn't provoke him like you do. I've chosen _you_ this time. There's no need for it."

"Bad habit."

He gave her his best apologetic stare, and noticed a smile creep onto her face.

"Quite."

"You should probably do that work you were on about."

She pecked him on the cheek, then let go of his hand and disappeared from the room.

-

"Ashley?"

"Hey mom,"

"I thought I should warn you, your father wishes to see you."

"Oh."

"You don't have to see him."

"No it- it's okay. When's he coming round?"

Helen looked a little guilty.

"I'm not sure. Probably tomorrow. He _was_ here but… we had a disagreement and I insisted he leave."

"You okay?"

"Yes darling, I'm quite alright."

Ashley lifted herself onto the counter and swung her legs back and forth.

"Mom?"

"Yes Ashley?"

"I've been thinking… maybe it's time I started helping you out again."

"I'm glad to hear that Ashley, truly."

"Cool. Well, just let me know when you need me." She said with a confident smile, jumping down from the counter and wandering off. She suddenly came back into the room with a puzzled look on her face. "Mom?"

"Yes?" she said turning to face her again.

"What's up with Will? He seems a little… pre-occupied."

"I wouldn't know." She said innocently.

"Come on mom, you can tell _me_." As Helen opened her mouth to confess all, the person in question entered the room. "Damn." Ashley muttered under her breath, certain she was about to find out something very juicy.

"Helen."

"William." She smirked.

He coughed, feeling a little flustered. Ashley rolled her eyes.

"Laters."

Once she'd left the room Will moved a little closer to Helen, trying to keep a professional demeanor.

"Something I can do for you William?"

"I was just wondering… who were you kissing when John appeared?"

"Nikola."

"O-oh. Right."

"You're surprised?"

"No. I mean, not really."

Irritated more like. But he supposed a few months of flirtation couldn't compete with over a century of unresolved sexual tension.


	16. Chapter 16

Hello! thanks so much for the last chapters reviews! Sorry this has been a long time coming, I've been overwhelmed with essays, and haven't had much time for my writing :( Wanted to get a chapter up before Christmas though as I'm without internet access for the next few weeks! Hope you like it, and as usual if you have time to leave a review that would be great :)

-

**Chapter 16**

Nikola stared across at the clock in the library. He was sure the ticking had become louder over the passed hour. Then again the house was quieter. It was approaching 1am and nobody seemed to be up anymore. Except him.

He closed the book he'd been reading and stood up, stretching his arms out and pondering his temptation to visit Helen. He knew it was an inappropriate time. But then when did inappropriate stop him doing anything?

-

Helen frowned as she glanced through the medical file she'd compiled on Anya. She'd seemed uneasy all afternoon but nothing in the file was giving Helen any clues as to why. A knock on her door interrupted her thoughts.

She put the file down, tied her robe around her, and slowly approached the door. She had an inkling who her visitor was, and found her hand hovering over the handle for a moment as she anticipated what his late visit might mean.

Nikola sighed to himself, deciding not to knock again in case she was sleeping, and heading back towards the lift. Then the door opened.

"Nikola?" she asked with an innocent look on her face.

He swiftly turned around, taking in her attire and the look in her eyes. He knew that expression, and she knew his.

"I realise it's late,"

"I wasn't sleeping."

He sauntered over to her, watching as she leant against the doorframe and eyed him.

"Did you get all your work done?"

He was keeping the conversation neutral, but both of them had other things on their mind.

"Yes." She replied simply, a small smile creeping onto her face.

"Nothing you needed a second opinion on?"

"No."

Her smile grew a little wider.

"Nothing you needed any… help… with?"

"There is actually. Something only a genius can help me with."

"Really?" His eyes lit up, and she stepped back to allow him into her room.

"Shut the door Nikola," she ordered as she untied her robe.

-

Henry rushed over to his laptop as the beep of a message sounded through the room.

"Ah! Yes!"

He couldn't believe his luck. Magnus was going to be so pleased with him. She'd been trying to track down an abnormal of this nature for over 3 years, and he finally had a tip off. He glanced at his watch, realising it was a tad late, but certain she wouldn't mind when she heard his news.

He made his way to her room, lifting his hand to knock and suddenly stopping mid air. He withdrew his hand. He pressed his ear to the door for a moment and his jaw went slack. Possibly wasn't a good time to speak to her.

He headed back to the lift and just stared at the buttons for a moment, feeling somewhat uncomfortable. He hit the floor Will's room was on and started fidgeting.

-

"Hey,"

"Uh, hey,"

Will frowned.

"You okay?"

Henry shrugged.

"I had some good news for Magnus but she seems a bit… preoccupied."

"Oh? What's she up to? She's not still working is she?"

"Oh- no. No not working. She has um… company."

"Company?"

Will's interest grew.

"Yeah."

"In her bedroom?"

Henry winced.

"Can we _not_ talk about it? She's like a mom to me dude,"

"Is it Nikola?"

Henry sighed.

"I don't know, but whoever it is knows exactly what he's doing with her. Now can we change the subject?"

Will laughed.

"Yeah, sorry. So what's the good news?"

-

When morning came Will entered the kitchen and Helen, Nikola, Henry and Ashley were all sat eating breakfast. He sat down and grabbed some toast, nearly dropping it when John teleported in just beside him.

"John-" Helen said a little shocked. "You could have let me know you were coming,"

He ignored her question, his focus moving to the man sat beside her making light work of an omelette.

"What's that useless _thing_ still doing here?" he asked with a glare towards Nikola. Surprisingly Nikola didn't rise to the comment. Instead he continued chewing his mouthful of food like it was the tastiest thing he'd ever eaten, and just gave John a wide smile.

"I'd rather you didn't refer to Nikola like that. He's here at my request, and if you want to carry on being allowed within these walls I suggest you show each other some respect." He looked extremely irritated, Nikola's calm demeanour helping none. "I mean it John. And he is _far_ from useless."

Henry choked on his breakfast and quickly grabbed a drink.

"Something amused you, boy?" John snapped at Henry. Henry quickly shook his head, looking scared.

"Nope. Just choked."

"You haven't been listening at doors have you Henry?" Helen asked him with a pointed stare. He felt his cheeks flushing crimson and shook his head a little too vigorously.

"God… no… I would _never_ do anything like that. Honestly Doc. Never."

"Glad to hear it. Now stop choking and finish your breakfast. We have work to do today."

"Understood."

It amused Will the fact that Helen was well aware she'd been heard in the throws of passion and wasn't embarrassed in the slightest. He let the amusement take precedence over his jealously, and glanced back towards John.

If looks could kill Nikola was certainly in trouble. John forced himself to avert his gaze, turning it to his daughter and sitting down opposite her.

"Are you alright?" He asked in a softer tone.

Ashley offered him a small smile.

"I'm fine… dad."

-

A/N: Hope everyone has a lovely Christmas and New Year! :)


	17. Chapter 17

:)

**Chapter 17**

Anya swayed as she left the lift. She couldn't help feeling sick. She initially thought it might be because she hadn't eaten yet, but her gut instinct told her it was more than that. She hadn't slept well last night. There was something close by, something that awoke all her base instincts and made her want to flee. She'd felt it before, it's presence. Then as quickly as it had come, it had gone; leaving her utterly confused.

She headed slowly through the hallway, finding her thoughts drifting to her most recent conversation with Helen. She had visited her yesterday afternoon, emitting the deepest concerns but not voicing them. Instead she had settled on encouraging Anya to join them for breakfast. She could tell the older woman had intentions on incorporating her into their family, but she couldn't give in to it, especially not when the closer she got to the dining room the more unnerved she felt. She'd never experienced anything quite like this sensation.

Her form changed...

Her breath quickened...

Her eyes grew dark and alert as though she were again on the hunt for death.

She took more cautious steps as she rounded the corner, too quiet in her movements for them to notice, or so she thought until her eyes met his.

John eyed the girl with curiosity as she stopped her movement, and stared back with a mixture of fear and contempt. He found her eyes considerably haunting to him, and he had a sense of unease and vulnerability that he wasn't particularly used to feeling. He supposed his discomfort in her presence might be in part due to the slight resemblence to Nikola's eyes when in his transformed state. Whatever the reason, he wasn't comfortable in her presence, and she clearly wasn't comfortable in his.

Anya looked at him, knowing immediately he was the cause of her unease and finding herself reflexively getting inside his head, figuring him out. He was so full of darkness; his very presence seeming to taint the air around him before her eyes. The images he was provoking in her mind were beyond horrific, and yet a glance around the rest of the room's guests told her he was allowed to be there, and caused a wave of conflicting feelings and impulses to wash over her all at once.

Still, he was what he was, and she had no intentions of sticking around.

"Anya?"

At Helen's question, Nikola also raised his eyes to her. She didn't respond in words, but Helen read Anya's fear as clear as anything, a fear invoked by John. Had she been conning herself thinking she could trust him in any way again? He had genuinely seemed to be sane again, or at least less _insane_. But now she worried her feelings towards him as Ashley's father were clouding her judgement.

Before she could ponder the situation any further Anya shot off out of the room, and Nikola wasn't far behind her.

-

He morphed into his vampiric self to keep her pace, knowing she was heading for the door.

"Anya, wait," he pleaded.

She heard such concern and sorrow in his voice she had to slow down. She had to speak to him, no matter how great the desire to flee at that moment in time. She couldn't just leave him - and she found she really didn't want to either. His arms found hers, and noticed that she was trembling.

"I can't stay here, I can't stay near that… man-"

"He's not _staying_ here,"

"His intentions aren't honourable. They never have been, even before you all did what you did."

"I'll get him to leave, but don't go, please,"

"If I stayed I'd be going against all of my instincts. The things I see in him the- the things that he radiates… I- I just- I can't stay here Nikola,"

He hated to see her in such panic, and as she started to back off he reached to her again and she let out a sob at the strength of his unwavering care for her.

"I won't let him hurt you,"

She believed his whispered promise, burying himself in his offered embrace and trying to ignore her anxieties.

-

Helen watched from the end of the hallway as Anya submitted to Nikola's embrace, feeling immediately guilty at the jealousy building inside her because another woman was in Nikola's arms. Arms that had not so long ago ensconced her in a feeling of bliss she hadn't experienced for too many years - hadn't allowed herself too.

She turned and walked with intent towards where John now stood by the table.

"John, I'm afraid I need you to leave,"

"I've only just got here-"

"Please, John,"

He glanced towards the doorway, sensing the young woman had something to do with this, and then in a flash he was gone.

"Mom what's going on?"

"I'm not entirely sure Ashley,"


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Nikola had managed to calm Anya down reasonably quickly once John had left. Then she had retreated to her room, and Helen had followed her.

"You don't understand."

"I understand that whatever you saw in him, terrified you."

"It's not just what I saw in him, it's _everything_ about him. Some people, when they go _crazy_… they hurt other people. Some people… turn that anger inwards, and hurt themselves. It's a fine line, but it means something. It's a part of them, not anyone around them. It might not seem like a significant difference, but it is. It _really_ is. He made a choice to hurt other people."

"He's Ashley's father-"

"And he's using that to his advantage!"

She didn't mean to get so exasperated with Helen, but the older woman just couldn't seem to accept John was trying to fool her.

Again.

She seemed so distressed by the whole situation, and desperate to find a solution that would suit everyone.

"I want you to stay here. You _are_ safe here."

"I can't. When I come across something like him I _d__on't_ stick around. Ever. It goes against all of my instincts."

"Ever?"

"Ever."

Helen was silent for a moment. Anya seemed so certain about leaving, but there had to be another way. There had to be a reason. She wished she knew more about Anya's abilities. She wished she had some sort of history to refer to for guidance, but she'd found almost nothing remotely related. She would have to learn, and document, for the benefit of future Drs. at the Sanctuary.

"Have you always been drawn to it? To people to- things that are a danger to others?"

"Always." Anya nodded.

"And you _always_ find them?"

"I have to. It's how I find the people I need to help the- the lives I need to restore."

"And it's always been that way?"

Anya nodded. "It has to be, and even then I can't save _everyone_, so I save those whose death would have a detrimental effect on the lives of those around them. I don't like having to pick and choose, that's just the way it is."

Helen's heart went out to her. She could see Anya felt guilty. Despite the lives she'd managed to save, she didn't feel it was enough. An idea sprung to mind, and she looked at Anya now with a new determination.

"Maybe you _could_ save everyone."

"Do you think I haven't tried? I don't have the time. I don't have the energy-" Anya stopped midsentence, suddenly realising where Helen's line of thought was taking her. "It wouldn't work." she finished, her tone less defensive.

"It might."

She reached to take Helen's hand, willing some sort of comfort into her.

"I know how much you want to save him. Even after everything… but I have to stay clear of him."

"But you _heal._ You _fix_ things, why can't you fix _him_? Then you _would_ be saving everyone, or at least, more than you have so far. Prevention must be better? Using your ability less must be better too, in the long run?"

"But he's not _dead_. He's not _dying_."

"Maybe not physically. But mentally. Emotionally. That's a kind of dying."

"His mind is so fragmented… I- I've never tried it. It might go wrong. It might not work." She pulled her hand away from Helen's, standing up and starting to pace. "When I do what I do, I get a whole sense of who that person is. Their life, their intentions, their memories. And I can't erase them. They stick with me. And for a little while, they take me over. He terrifies me Helen, I don't wanna get so inside his head."

Helen dropped her head slightly, her eyes closing as she considered what she'd asked Anya to do.

"I'm sorry, I- I shouldn't have asked. I'm sorry," Helen repeated, then made a hasty exit.


	19. Chapter 19

Thanks so much for the reviews! They make me smile :D

**Chapter nineteen**

Anya stood outside the door, gently pressing her hands against the wood.

.

Helen was the other side, crying softly in the privacy of her bedroom. She just needed a moment, then she could wipe the tears away and carry on like nothing had happened, like she wasn't upset. She didn't like to show this vulnerable side of herself in front of anyone – not even Nikola. So when the door opened and she saw Anya, she turned quickly around to hide her tears, hastily wiping them away and taking a few deep breaths.

"It's alright to cry you know,"

"I wasn't crying," her voice didn't come out as strongly as she'd intended. She felt a hand on her arm and was overcome by the soothing sensation that ran through her at the contact.

"I'll try your idea. I know I was quick to dismiss it before, but it's just because I'm afraid. You might be right, and if I don't try this now I'll always be wondering what if? You know?"

More composed now, Helen turned around to face Anya.

"You don't have to do this."

"I know."

"If it doesn't feel right, you have to stop. Immediately."

"I will. I only have one condition."

"Of course,"

"I don't wanna be alone with him."

"You won't be. I'll be right there with you. And Nikola will be there too. We wouldn't let him harm you."

.

John shifted uncomfortably on the infirmary bed. If this meant he had a chance to be a proper part of Helen and Ashley's life again, then he was willing to try it. Even so, he couldn't help the uncomfortable feeling that was getting more intense the closer the girl got to him.

She was feeling just as awkward as him, he could see it. He'd agreed to be bound down, for Anya's sake apparently; and Helen had activated the shield to ensure he wouldn't be teleporting anywhere.

John glanced sideways at Nikola, who responded by inching closer to Helen and slipping his hand into hers. The edge of his mouth quirked up in a subtle smile, and John frowned in disgust at the half-vampire.

"You can still change your mind," Helen offered, noting Anya's hesitation to get any closer.

"I'm okay," she announced, stalking over to the infirmary bed and moving her hands to John's, pressing their palms together and taking a few deep breaths.

The feelings rushing at her felt a little peculiar, a little alien. But she'd never done this on someone who was still alive before, so she pushed the uneasiness to the back of her mind. She was surprised to find that none of the feelings she'd had last time they were together in the same room were there. Maybe Helen was right. Maybe she was supposed to be curing the attackers instead of saving the victims. She assessed the situation. How would saving John impact the lives around her? She sighed. None of this felt clear. Everything felt mixed up.

Her black eyes shifted to Helen's blue to search for her fate. Relief. Forgiveness. Hope for her daughter to finally have her father, and hope for her future with Nikola. But then she sensed guilt, and despair, feeling a prickly sensation rush up her spine that made her momentarily hold her breath.

She didn't understand. Things were usually always so clear for her, but this was different, this was confusing. She couldn't judge this against anything else. John wasn't her ordinary subject. He must somehow be affecting her ability.

She moved her eyes to Nikola, trying to calm herself down. All she sensed from him was fear, and then a feeling of numbness. An overwhelming sickness ran through her entire being. She closed her eyes and tried to make sense of it. He was probably scared that he'd lose Helen if John was cured. Despite everything... despite the reassurances he'd had, he still didn't believe she could have chosen him this time round.

She took another deep breath and concentrated on John. It'd be alright. She'd reassure Nikola. Helen wasn't going to turn her back on him, she just wanted her daughter to have her father. She wanted John to be the man she used to know.

She slowed her breathing right down, and focused.

Helen watched as Anya was surrounded by the same glow as she had been with Ashley, and it grew outwards to engulf John. Her heart started pounding in her chest, and she gripped Nikola's hand tighter. Was it working?

"No!"

She jumped slightly in alarm as John seemed to answer her internal question. He was breathing fast and seemed to be starting to panic. But he didn't speak again, instead his body jolted up from the table and he writhed against the restraints.

Helen started towards them but Nikola held her back, and within seconds John let out a sound of anguish, dropping back down to the table. As he landed Anya jolted backwards, her eyes wide with terror. And then she collapsed.

"A-Anya?"

Helen was frozen to the spot, watching as Nikola knelt beside her and pulled her up from the floor.

She didn't open her eyes.

She didn't move.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

Nikola resumed his position by Anya's bedside.

Helen hadn't been able to find anything physically wrong with her, and they could only presume exhaustion had caused her collapse. She knew she ought to check on John. He'd been unconscious when they left him. But she was too concerned at the moment for Anya's wellbeing, especially since it was because of _her_ Anya tried to heal him.

She sat herself down next to Nikola, just watching him for a while. She couldn't tell what he was thinking and she was worried he might blame her for Anya's condition. She moved her gaze to the young woman who still lay motionless in bed.

"Are you upset with me?"

Her voice was unnaturally timid.

"Why would I be upset with you?" Nikola asked, turning to face her.

"She didn't think it would work. She didn't want to do it. _You_ didn't want her to do it. If I hadn't asked then-"

"You didn't force her Helen. Just like I didn't try and stop her. It was her decision. We just have to believe she'll be okay."

"But what if she isn't? It'd be my fault. I didn't care for your opinion and-"

"She'll be okay." He assured her. "Yes, I was worried for her. But more then anything," he hesitated, "I didn't want John to be cured."

Helen looked across at him now with a confused expression.

"Why?"

He let out a pained laugh and lowered his gaze away from her.

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Oh, Nikola," her expression softened as it dawned on her why he wouldn't want John to be cured. She reached for his hand and moved to peck him on the cheek. "It wouldn't change anything. Not between us." Seeing he was still unconvinced she turned his face to her and kissed him tenderly on the lips. "Believe me. I just wanted Ashley to know her father as he was, before the source blood. Before the… madness."

He gave her a small smile, reaching towards her and running his thumb across her bottom lip. Before he could grace her with another kiss he noticed slight movement in his peripheral vision. When he turned to Anya he saw her eyes flutter open and stare calmly up at the ceiling.

"Oh, thank God," he said as he moved closer to the bed and reached for her hand. "I'm so glad you're okay." He said with a warm smile. But she didn't respond. He looked towards Helen who was now on her feet next to him, and moved out of the way so she could get closer.

"Anya, are you alright?"

No response.

"Anya?" she asked again, moving to stroke her cheek as though that might get her attention, but she just continued staring blankly up at the ceiling. Helen turned Anya's face to one side, but she just seemed to stare straight through her.

"Nikola, something's wrong,"

He didn't miss the edge of panic to her voice.

"Maybe she's still sleeping. People sleep with their eyes open sometimes."

She gave him a weak smile. He was trying to reassure her.

"She's not asleep Nikola." She turned back to Anya and shined a light in her eyes to check her pupils responded correctly, but before she could judge their reaction Anya closed her eyes and turned her head away.

"Okay so she can definitely see us. That's good right?"

Helen didn't answer him, just continued talking to Anya.

"Anya, you're going to be alright. But I need you to talk to me, okay?"

Still no response.

.

Anya's condition hadn't changed for the better over the course of the evening. She seemed to be apathetic – an extreme contrast to how she usually was. She responded to almost nothing, and despite Helen's attempts to establish some sort of connection to her, she just continued to stare blankly.

She'd talked at length with Nikola about the possible cause for her current behaviour, noting the similarities of her symptoms to a sort of catatonic stupor found in some schizophrenics. Nikola had suggested the possibility it had been caused by John's mental state. He reminded her that when he had given John a dose of his own special ECT it had been beneficial. But neither of them had any desire to try such a trick on Anya yet.

So Nikola had insisted she get some sleep, saying he would keep watch and let her know if there was any change.

.

Ashley heard her bedroom door open, turning over and squinting at the light coming in from the hallway. She could tell the silhouette was her mom.

"Mom? You okay?"

"Can I stay in here with you tonight?"

Ashley nodded, pulling the duvet cover back and giving her a sympathetic look. She climbed in and snuggled up to her daughter.

"I got it wrong Ashley. She felt obliged to help me, despite everything in her gut telling her that it wouldn't work. I've made such a mess of things."

"Is… dad… still unconscious?"

"Yes."

Ashley frowned, thinking about how not so long ago their roles had been reversed, and it had been _her_ seeking her _mother's _comfort.

"It'll be okay y'know."

"She won't talk, she won't respond, she won't eat anything. She just lies there, unresponsive. How can anything be okay now? After all she did for us. She saved your life, and I've let her down."

"You don't know that for sure yet." She cuddled closer to her mom. "But even if you have, it's okay to get it wrong sometimes."

Helen laughed.

"This is where you tell me it will all be alright in the morning."

"Maybe it will be."


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: Sorry for the delay in posting this chapter. I had to spend some time in hospital. As always thanks to those of you who are still reading this, and thanks to those of you who've had the time to leave a review :) On with the story :)

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**Chapter Twenty One**

Helen opened her eyes. She was confused for a moment that the ceiling she was staring at was not her own, but smiled as she remembered why. She glanced sideways at her daughter, who was still happily snoozing. She'd found her company to be a great comfort. Nonetheless, she had a long day ahead and needed to get up and prepared. She moved as carefully as she could so as not to disturb Ashley, then leant over her, pressing a kiss to her cheek and pulling the covers up around her shoulders.

Once bathed and dressed she checked on her patients - who she was pleased to find were already being fed by Henry and Will. They both gave her concerned glances, but she smiled her departure before either of them could stop to ask her how she was.

When she reached Anya's room she refrained from going inside just yet. She could see Nikola sat with her through the observation window, not doubting he had indeed spent the night keeping watch over her. He was trying to get her to respond, but apparently not having much luck.

She paused for a moment longer, but she was only delaying the inevitable. She had to check on John. She wasn't sure if he would have woken up yet, but she needed to talk to him as soon as he did. She needed to see if this had all been worth it.

.

"Helen?" he greeted her softly.

Her eyes quickly moved to his as a sense of relief washed over her. She quashed it, quickly reminding herself he might not be any different.

"John, you're awake," she greeted him somewhat formally, approaching where he lay and starting to run some checks on him. "How are you feeling?"

"Like… myself." He offered her a sheepish smile that reminded her of when they'd first been courting all those years ago, but she couldn't get her hopes up so soon.

"Which self?"

"My old self," he insisted, unappreciative of her sudden bitter tone. "I feel different Helen. Everything seems so much clearer. So much purer." When she didn't respond he glanced towards his restraints, then back up at her. "Will you ever trust me again? Like you used to? Before everything… changed?"

"How can I know if Anya really did help you? Or if this is just one of your games?"

"Getting you to trust me again isn't a game Helen. No matter what you believe, I've always cared deeply for you. Regaining your trust _means_ something to me."

"Until I can ascertain exactly what happened, I'd feel more comfortable keeping you restrained. I'm sorry John. You must understand. Anya didn't believe she could actually help you. How do I know it hasn't actually made things worse?"

"You can keep your EM shield up. I won't be teleporting anywhere. I went into this willingly remember? For you... For Ashley. Can't you give me the benefit of the doubt?"

Helen didn't reply, instead pushing the needle a little harshly into his vein to take a blood sample.

"Get Anya in here if you'd prefer. She can tell you if-"

"She can't tell me anything." She snapped. "She isn't well."

"I'm sorry." He offered.

"I'll be back as soon as I have these results."

"Helen, wait-"

He let out a long sigh. He had to be patient with her. He had to prove to her he was really ok. He owed her so much.

.

"Nikola?"

Nikola turned as Helen entered the room, unable to stop himself appreciating her in her white lab coat. He made himself focus and look back at her face.

"Helen my dear, how can I be of assitance?"

"I need your opinion on something. Come quickly."

He glanced briefly at Anya, and then followed after Helen.

"You _know _I like you in your lab coat. But is now really the time to play dress up?"

"Nikola, this is serious."

.

It was some time later when John heard the door to his room open again. This time Helen hadn't come alone, but that bothered him less when she made her way over to him to remove his restraints.

"Thankyou," He rubbed at his wrists as he sat himself up on the bed, eyeing Nikola with apprehension. "Well well, Nikola, coming to visit me? I didn't know you cared."

He remained suspiciously quiet.

"John, I need your help with something."

He looked back to Helen, seeing concern in her eyes.

"Of course."

She took a breath to calm herself.

"I've had Henry disable the EM shield."


	22. Chapter 22

:)

**Chapter Twenty Two**

"Is there some sort of emergency?"

Helen hesitated.

"Not so much an emergency as… helping me test a theory."

"Alright." He straightened up. "Tell me what you need me to do."

.

Anya opened her eyes, taking a deep breath and staring around the room. She cautiously tried to move her hands.

When she managed to wiggle her fingers she let out a sigh of relief. She wasn't trapped anymore, and the constant feeling of nausea had dissipated.

She sat up in bed and rubbed at her eyes, then swung her legs out from underneath the covers and yawned. She wondered how long it had been since she'd purged John of the monster inside him.

.

Helen smiled awkwardly.

"I think Ashley should be here for this. Could you go get her?"

"Of course." He smiled.

And then nothing.

Helen and Nikola exchanged glances.

"She's in her bedroom, John."

"I realise that Helen." John said sounding a little concerned.

Still nothing.

"John?"

"I- I don't know what that… _girl_… has done to me but I can't- I can't teleport."

"Maybe you just need a little time." she offered, needing him to calm down.

"I don't need any time Helen!" He snapped. "I know how to teleport like you know how to draw breath. It doesn't take me any effort. All I have to do is have a destination in mind I-" he glanced at Nikola who had started to smirk at him. "You knew!"

"We suspected." Nikola offered, still looking rather pleased about the whole situation.

"Helen?" he turned back to her for an explanation, looking quite distressed now. She couldn't help but feel sympathetic towards him, but it didn't change the past. It didn't change the hurtful things he'd done.

"I'm sorry John, but there was no trace of the source blood in your system. It's like you never had it."

"That's not possible." He started to stress. "Where is the girl? She has to fix this."

"John, I think she _did_ fix you. I think your ability to teleport had to be taken out of the equation altogether in order for you to truly get better."

"Where is she?" he fumed, starting to pace around the room so he didn't have to look at the wariness in Helen's eyes.

"I think you should have some time alone for a while. I'll be back later on to see how you're feeling."

"Helen wait-"

She left. It wasn't the first time she'd walked away from him mid-conversation and he supposed it wouldn't be the last.

.

"Helen,"

"I'm alright Nikola."

"Then why are y-"

"Anya?"

Nikola turned his attention towards the young girl headed slowly their way.

"Helen. Nikola." She said with a small smile.

"When did you wake up?" Nikola took over the conversation as he approached her and pulled her into a hug.

"Not long ago. It's nice to be able to move again."

"You need to take things easy Anya. You've been through a lot these last few days. Please, come sit down and I'll get you something to eat."

Anya obliged, following Helen into the library nearby.

.

Helen sent Bigfoot a text, then turned her attention back to Anya.

"Do you know what happened?" Helen asked. "John can't teleport anymore."

Anya nodded.

"I know. I think I took that fragmented part of his mind that provoked his violence and trapped it inside me. The teleportion acted as a catalyst. Everytime he did it he lost a little more of himself, and became more of a monster." she shifted in her seat, pulling her legs up and hugging them against her chest. "I only remember bits about it, but when I woke up I couldn't move properly. I couldn't talk to you. I think my body trapped my mind so I wouldn't act out any of the things John did."

"So you were aware the whole time?"

Anya nodded again.

"It wasn't a nice experience. It was like I couldn't think properly, or communicate. I just felt so sick, and afraid. I've never felt like that before. I didn't know what was going to happen. I could have been trapped like that forever."

"I'm so sorry Anya," Helen said, taking her hand. "I shouldn't have pushed you into it. We didn't know how it would effect you."

"No we didn't, but I killed it Helen. That monster I purged from him it- it's dead. If we hadn't tried to help him I might never have known what I was capable of."

Nikola looked pensive. "So when you heal someone physically, it makes you less physically active, hence the increased need to sleep. Whilst you heal yourself? And when you heal someone emotionally… psychologically… it makes you less emotionally active? Whilst you effectively destroy whatever it is you've taken from them?"

"Something like that." She agreed. "I think I need to see him again though. Is he alright?"

"He's awake."

"He's not happy."

"No." Helen shook her head.


	23. Chapter 23

Hi all! Here's another update! Thanks for the reviews and hope you're all still enjoying this fic :)

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**Chapter Twenty Three**

Anya hesitated, lifting one hand to the door and trailing her fingers down towards the handle. She took a calming breath, glancing back at Helen, then entering the room. John lifted his eyes to the young girl, but was surprised to find that her presence seemed comforting. Any desire to act revenge on her for taking his abnormality away was fading to the back of his mind. She didn't seem to be uncomfortable around him now either.

"I'm sorry." She offered.

He gave her a small smile, but struggled to find any reassuring words. He was still undecided as to how she'd made things better in the long run. No matter what had happened, he still had the memories of his life, the memories of the murders he had committed; and for the first time in over a century, he felt an unfamiliar pang of guilt.

Anya moved closer towards him, shifting state and seeing him lay bare. He wasn't trying to block her out as he had done before. Nor did he seem to want to antagonise her. He just seemed… out of his comfort zone.

"I'm struggling to understand how it is you've made things better for me. For anyone."

"It's better." She replied simply.

"Is that what you intend to report back to Helen?" His voice was tinged with a sadness she hadn't sensed from him before.

"I'm not here to report _anything_. I'm here because what happened affected _me _too."

"Can you teleport?"

She let out a laugh.

"No. That's not how it works."

He hesitated before offering, "I'm glad you're alright."

"Really?"

Her gaze was piercing, but he didn't let it intimidate him.

"You don't have to ask." He replied simply, accepting he couldn't fool her even if he'd wanted to.

.

Helen supposed if she wasn't so good at retaining her composure, she'd be pacing the room by now. As it was, she'd allowed herself to check her watch several times in the past hour and a half, and that wasn't going to make Anya any quicker.

.

When Anya finally left John's room and arrived at Helen's door, her expression was unreadable.

"Anya?" Helen asked worriedly.

"It's still there."

Helen was confused.

"He can still teleport? Then why-"

"Not that." She moved over to Helen's desk and perched on the edge.

"Then what?"

Anya's responses remained somewhat ambiguous and non-committal.

"He's still John." She replied simply, but felt guilty at being so non-descriptive. "Helen," she moved closer, reaching for her hand in an attempt to soothe her. "I don't need to remind you this, but everyone, even you and me, _everyone_ is capable of doing terrible things given a particular set of circumstances. Just because a lot of people don't act on that capability, doesn't mean they're any better for it."

"Do you think you could be any more vague?"

"I can't tell you to trust him."

Helen lowered her gaze. Had she really thought it was going to be so easy?

"I never asked you to."

"For what it's worth, you can let Ashley have something akin to a normal relationship with her father now."

Helen smiled slightly, but was still confused as to which part of John was still John. She supposed maybe even Anya might struggle to read him properly. Before she could ponder the situation any further, Anya had lifted her arms around her neck and moved closer for a hug. She instinctively held her close, not knowing what had spurred the sudden gesture of affection, but not wanting to reject it.

She felt tingly, and a little numb, and suddenly very tired. She never remembered how it happened, but she was suddenly lay down with Anya putting a cushion beneath her head, and then everything faded to black.

"Anya?"

Nikola stood in the doorway, worried at Helen's sudden tiredness and unconscious state on the floor.

"She's alright." Anya quickly assured him, glancing at Helen one last time, before moving over towards Nikola.

"What's wrong with her?"

He wasn't feeling reassured. He'd just seen the two women hugging and now Helen was unconscious.

.

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More soon :)


	24. Chapter 24

Thanks muchly for all the lovely reviews :) This was originally going to be the last chapter but my muse wasn't satisfied it had quite rounded things up like I wanted them to be :) So there's another chapter after this :) Enjoy!

.

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**Chapter Twenty Four**

"She's just tired Nikola," she offered, "_you_ know that better than anyone."

He frowned. She might be tired but what he saw wasn't so much a collapse, as Anya gently helping her lay down before she went unconscious. Anya was right though, he did know how tired Helen had been recently. He was the one who'd been sharing her bed, watching her pretend to be asleep. Still, something in his gut told him things weren't as simple as that.

He moved closer, bending down next to Helen and gently reaching out to her. He looked up at Anya, something unspoken passing between them. He would have to question her further later and she was well aware of that, but for now his main concern was Helen's comfort.

Anya watched him tenderly pick Helen up from the floor. He knew there was more to it, but for now he seemed to be accepting her explanation for Helen's state.

"Can you get the doors for me," he asked, and she obliged.

.

"What's wrong with the doc?" Henry asked, meeting them as they reached her bedroom.

"She fainted," Anya offered, but Henry didn't miss the look that Anya and Nikola exchanged. "She'll be alright." She continued, opening the door and letting Nikola inside to lay Helen on her bed. "What's that?" she eyed the file in Henry's hands.

"Research. Co-ordinates. I got a tip off about an extremely rare abnormal Magnus has been trying to track down for over three years. She asked me to try and pinpoint it's location so we can do a retrieval. Things got delayed a bit what with Ash… and then… you know, Druitt."

"Maybe leave it for today. She'll be better rested by tomorrow."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"Have you seen Will?"

"Oh uh, yeah, he was in his room last time I checked."

"Thanks." She hesitated, then flung her arms around him for a hug.

"Woah-"

Anya pulled back and smiled.

"Sorry, I just needed a hug," she responded innocently, then wandered off in search of Will.

.

Will took his glasses off and rubbed at his eyes. He didn't know how Helen managed to keep alert for so long. He was lagging and he'd had a lay in that morning too.

"Not disturbing you I hope,"

"Anya, no, no come in." He cleared off one of the seats for her and moved over to join her. "How you feeling?"

"Good. You?"

He laughed at her almost reflexive response.

"You're not turning into Magnus on me are you?"

"No. I'm actually good." She smiled. "The reason I'm here… well, I just wanted to thank you."

"What for?"

"For… trying. For talking with me. I know I'm not the easiest to talk to."

"You don't have to thank me for that. You intrigue me. I like to be intrigued." He stumbled a little over his words and she saw him blush. Whether or not he intended it, he'd become quite fond of her.

"Maybe you'll figure me out one day." She offered, then leant towards him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Before he could properly acknowledge where that might have come from, she was up on her feet and half way out the door.

"Maybe." He sighed to himself.

.

Ashley sat on the bed beside her mom. Nikola had come to tell her she'd fainted, and despite reassuring her she'd be okay, she'd had to go be with her straight away. She wanted to be there when she woke up again. She supposed she felt so unnerved because her mom had always burned the candle at both ends, but never in her 23 years of life had she known her to faint from exhaustion, or ever be ill.

"Nikola?"

Ashley and Nikola both glanced up to see Anya in the doorway.

"Yes?"

"Can I speak with you for a minute?"

He reluctantly let go of Helen's hand, and made his way outside, shutting the door behind him so they could be private.

Ashley sighed. She'd wanted to be alone with her mom for a while, so she was thankful for the interruption. She laid down and curled up beside her.

"Come on mom, wake up." she whispered.

.

When Nikola returned many minutes later, he looked a little saddened by something, and a little concerned. But he didn't divulge anything, so she didn't ask.

.

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A/N: more soon :)


	25. Chapter 25

So here it is, the last chapter of this story :) Enjoy!

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**Chapter Twenty Five**

Helen opened her eyes, blinking a few times before everything came back into focus.

"Nikola?"

"I'm here,"

"What happened?"

"You… fainted."

"Oh," she seemed confused, sitting up slowly and inwardly cursing at the creases in her clothes. "Where's Anya?"

She slid her legs over the edge of the bed and started to stand, but felt very dizzy and quickly sat back down.

"Easy," Nikola soothed, reaching out to her to help her steady herself.

"I just stood up too quickly." She reassured him, trying again more slowly and relieved to find that indeed the dizziness had passed. "Where's Anya?" she asked again, focusing on him now and seeing he looking a little upset about something.

"She's left."

"Why?"

"She wasn't very forthcoming. She said she'll never be far if we need her for anything, she just couldn't settle. She's used to moving around."

"That's a shame." Helen frowned.

"Yes, it is."

She studied him for a moment longer.

"Is that all that's bothering you?"

"I'm just worried about you. I'm worried you don't take the same care of yourself as you do with your patients."

He hoped she was convinced. Anya had made him promise he wouldn't divulge anything else she'd told him, and this was probably the only instance when he would keep anything from Helen. He hated it, but he understood Anya's reasoning.

"I'm alright Nikola." She reassured him, taking his hand in hers. "I'm alright."

.

"Hey… dad."

"Ashley?"

She held his gaze for a moment, before moving closer to him and sitting down.

"How are you feeling?"

"Good. A little claustrophobic but, good."

She eyed him for a long while. Anya had helped him, she knew she had, and for now her gut instinct was telling her he could be trusted.

For now.

"Does your mother know you've come to visit me?"

Ashley avoided his gaze.

"Ashley?" he pressed.

"Don't take that tone with me," she teased. "I know you're my dad an' all but we've really not reached the stage you have any place to tell me off yet."

He smiled.

"Fair enough. I just appreciate you giving me the benefit of the doubt."

She offered him a smile in return.

"I thought maybe we could practice my hand to hand combat. I vaguely remember you saying I have decent technique but lack in discipline."

His smile grew wider. Whatever had made her warm to him over the past few days he wasn't sure. He supposed Anya could have had some influence after all. Nonetheless, she was reaching out to him, and he finally had a chance to connect.

"Shall we begin?"

.

Helen watched from the security camera as John and Ashley practised her fighting skills together. She felt a twinge of worry, but it dissipated when she noticed Bigfoot was close by, always keeping an eye out.

She had to admit Ashley was already showing improvement – and it might help boost her confidence again. Seeing them together reminded her just how similar they really were. Helen had always preferred a colourful array of weapons, Ashley had always liked to be hands on.

Just like her father.

In the past their likenesses had worried her. She knew John had a mean streak in him, an ugly side; that had become so apparent when he'd continued to slaughter all those women, refusing her help. She only hoped that now he'd been freed of his ability, that his bitterness seemed to have dissolved and that she was letting him interact with his daughter again, he would keep himself controlled, and teach her the same discipline.

She found her thoughts resting on Anya again. She'd truly hoped they could integrate the young woman into their family. At least she'd agreed to stay in touch with Nikola.

The man in question wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed the back of her neck lovingly.

.

Outside Anya took a long look at the Sanctuary. The place she'd almost allowed herself to call home. She'd never expected to come away with such a sense of freedom. She didn't have to worry about the Cabal tracking her movements anymore.

Something that had been such a burden to Druitt, that had cursed him with a madness he couldn't contain, had become a blessing to her. It wouldn't consume her like it had Druitt. Her own abnormality was her safeguard against that.

She wiped tears from her face, she would be back if Nikola ever needed her. She would be back if Helen needed her.

"Time to go," she whispered to the wind, before teleporting away.

.

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A/N: Okay so don't go mad about me not divulging the convo between Nikola and Anya *hides* there were two secrets and I've only allowed you one of them – the other will be revealed in the sequel… should anyone like one :)

Thanks for reading!


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